Back in 2001, a young writer/director named Richard Kelly made a film called Donnie Darko (yes, it really was that long ago). It was an incredible movie, loved by critics and, depsite it's indie credentials, audiences everywhere. The film worked because it was unlike anything seen before, a subversive blend of arthouse surrealism and mainstream drama, with an incredibly affecting ending. The film's weirdness is often focussed on. After seeing The Box, Kelly's latest, the director's debut seems incredibly normal.
The Box starts off (relatively) simple. Set in 1970's Virginia, a young couple, Arthur (James Marsden) and Norma (Cameron Diaz), striving to give their son an education at a top school, are given a mysterious box by the charming, heavily scarred Arlington Steward (Frank Langella). He posits them with a moral dilemma - if they decide to press the encased button they will recieve $1million. However, someone who they don't know will also die. Sounds far too narrow a plotline, right? How can they make a whole movie out of that?
Well, if it helps, by halfway through the movie, you'll forget it was ever about a box. What follows is something of a conspiracy thriller gone off the rails. Kelly can't even stick to one genre in his fevered attempt to destroy the brains of audiences worldwide, flitting through sci-fi, horror, drama, and even fantasy, as the reality of Steward's plans become (slightly) clear. This is not an easy film to follow - towards the end it almost becomes a mess of half-baked ideas, becoming like one of those TV shows (Lost, Heroes, etc.) which open so many plot strands that there's almost no way of tying them up coherently. That most of the plot strands are tied up is testament to Kelly's skill, both as a writer, and as a lunatic who's brain can seem to process a billion things at once.
Sure, there's a lot of stuff that's not explained, and this becomes even more apparent upon a rewatch. And a lot of elements are left incredibly ambiguous. Who are Steward's 'employers' he so frequently refers to? It's up to us, the audience, to figure that out. And you can tell that Kelly wants it that way. In fact, above all, the audacity of this film can't help but be admired. Here we have a big, Hollywood blockbuster blueprint, with a twisty plot, a 12A rating, and Cameron Diaz in the lead. However, Kelly just can't resist, and tries to mess with the audience the whole time. Complex moral questions pepper the whole piece, challenging us not just to think about the plot, but to think about humanity, philosophy, and ethics. Not only all this, but he ends the film on an unsettling, disturbing note, a ten-minute long scene that not only presents us with an even more complex moral issue that the film's starter, but also one of the most puzzling final shots in recent memory. This is the kind of film you'll need flipcharts and multiple-coloured pens to follow perfectly.
However, as brain-bustingly bamboozling as it all may be, it's also extremely entertaining, and this is why it all works. Your head may begin to ache after a while, but you'll also be gripped, wondering how the hell it can all possibly make sense. The big twists are perhaps not as satisfying as they should be, but, then again, your mind has to make half of them up. All the central performances are also very impressive, particularly Langella as Steward, who manages to be completely charming and completely psychotic at the same time, never once losing his cool, but even more creepy because of it. The CGI that is used to cut off half of his face is also incredibly impressive, with many 'how the hell did they do that?' moments. In fact, the only problem is that it's somewhat distracting from his performance, such is the incredibly grotesque quality of it.
If you're prepared to sit down, let your brain ache, and have a good think whilst at it, The Box is a blast. If you're not in this state of mind however, you'll probably still have a blast, wondering just where it can go after it reaches the pinnacle of it's insanity. And even if the final destination disappoints you, the journey is well worth it.
4/5
Monday, 7 December 2009
Friday, 4 December 2009
Today, volunteer for jihad on behalf of the West
Okay, so I'll admit it - I had no idea how the fuck I could even attempt to do this one. The aim was to, and I quote, 'drop everything, book a ticket to the Pakistani badlands, and tell your proud family you're off to join the battle on behalf of Mozart, Shakespeare and Rembrandt.' Oooookay. Well, because I a) am not suicidal, b) am against war, c) don't have a lot of money, and d) don't take this book THAT seriously, it was immediately obvious that there was no way in hell that I was gonna actually gonna go to Pakistan and start slaying soldiers so I could make Europe proud.
So, I tried really hard (and I mean, I've been thinking since I got the book), about ways around this. When, one day, my beautiful friend Jay, beacon of knowledge that she is, told me that there are two forms of jihad, lesser jihad and greater jihad. Lesser jihad is pretty much battle, going to war to protect your country/beliefs. However, greater jihad is battling for oneself, one's country, one's beliefs - but without any physical violence involved. Kind of more spiritual, and more patriotic in a less jingoistic way.
So, being the genius that I (debatably) am, I decided that the only way around this was to be super patriotic on behalf of Europe for a day! I figured this pretty much makes sense, although my loose grasp on politics (even though I find politics kinda interesting) means that my way of thinking is probably slightly special. Twist the term 'special' to how you feel it relates to me.
Being super-patriotic wasn't easy, although that's mainly because I had no idea how. So, unfortuantely, I didn't go about it the best way. But here's what I tried.
I planned to wear a t-shirt that was made and sold in Europe in the morning. However, I was in a rush, so I just threw on my McLovin shirt, which promotes an American movie, and was probably made in some factory in China. Bad, bad start.
On the way up to Uni, I got out some money from the cash machine, and kissed the picture of the Queen. Now, I feel that THAT was pretty patriotic. I don't think that anyone saw me, which is a very good thing, because I felt a bit odd for doing it. But that's how I show my love for Europe, dammit!
Upon leaving the bus up to Uni, I decided to use a very British phrase (you can see this is mainly patriotic towards the UK, I should've spoken a bit of German or something); 'Cheers, mate!'. Or it could be a very Australian phrase. Depends on how you say it in your head. In my head it's Australian, weirdly. It sounded very unnatural coming from me, I sometimes use the word 'mate', but it usually depends on company, and it's not something I say a lot anyway.
However, the main thing I did to be patriotic was to only listen to music from Europe. I listen to a lot of music, as I always have my iPod on shuffle when travelling. So today, I skipped any bands that weren't European, and instead listened to loads of British bands, with the odd German or Swedish metal band thrown in for good measure. The good news is, this meant I got to listen to a fair amount of Jesu and Fuck Buttons. The bad news is, it meant I had to listen to Tom Jones (and if you're wondering why he's on my iPod, he did a Bond theme). Actually, I didn't really mind that too much at all, he has quite the set the lungs! It meant I had to skip a lot of awesome bands (I was totally in the mood for Between The Buried And Me), but I still got a whole load of decent tunes.
I only cheated twice. Once was because I really wanted to listen to 'Dear Jamie... Sincerely Me' by Hellogoodbye (I've been craving to listen to that song for ages, so I YouTubed it), and once when we listened to Pink's (or P!nk's, I'm not sure what it is) 'Funhouse' album at Jay and Kate's. However, this was very much made up for by the fact that I didn't actually tell anybody I was only listening to European music (though I probably should have), and because we also listened to Fleetwood Mac and The Levellers.
So what have we learned about patriotism today, kids? Yes, that's right! We have learned that to be truly patriotic, you must only listen to music from your own continent! Now all I have to do is tell the whole world, and maybe all the wars will end...
So, I tried really hard (and I mean, I've been thinking since I got the book), about ways around this. When, one day, my beautiful friend Jay, beacon of knowledge that she is, told me that there are two forms of jihad, lesser jihad and greater jihad. Lesser jihad is pretty much battle, going to war to protect your country/beliefs. However, greater jihad is battling for oneself, one's country, one's beliefs - but without any physical violence involved. Kind of more spiritual, and more patriotic in a less jingoistic way.
So, being the genius that I (debatably) am, I decided that the only way around this was to be super patriotic on behalf of Europe for a day! I figured this pretty much makes sense, although my loose grasp on politics (even though I find politics kinda interesting) means that my way of thinking is probably slightly special. Twist the term 'special' to how you feel it relates to me.
Being super-patriotic wasn't easy, although that's mainly because I had no idea how. So, unfortuantely, I didn't go about it the best way. But here's what I tried.
I planned to wear a t-shirt that was made and sold in Europe in the morning. However, I was in a rush, so I just threw on my McLovin shirt, which promotes an American movie, and was probably made in some factory in China. Bad, bad start.
On the way up to Uni, I got out some money from the cash machine, and kissed the picture of the Queen. Now, I feel that THAT was pretty patriotic. I don't think that anyone saw me, which is a very good thing, because I felt a bit odd for doing it. But that's how I show my love for Europe, dammit!
Upon leaving the bus up to Uni, I decided to use a very British phrase (you can see this is mainly patriotic towards the UK, I should've spoken a bit of German or something); 'Cheers, mate!'. Or it could be a very Australian phrase. Depends on how you say it in your head. In my head it's Australian, weirdly. It sounded very unnatural coming from me, I sometimes use the word 'mate', but it usually depends on company, and it's not something I say a lot anyway.
However, the main thing I did to be patriotic was to only listen to music from Europe. I listen to a lot of music, as I always have my iPod on shuffle when travelling. So today, I skipped any bands that weren't European, and instead listened to loads of British bands, with the odd German or Swedish metal band thrown in for good measure. The good news is, this meant I got to listen to a fair amount of Jesu and Fuck Buttons. The bad news is, it meant I had to listen to Tom Jones (and if you're wondering why he's on my iPod, he did a Bond theme). Actually, I didn't really mind that too much at all, he has quite the set the lungs! It meant I had to skip a lot of awesome bands (I was totally in the mood for Between The Buried And Me), but I still got a whole load of decent tunes.
I only cheated twice. Once was because I really wanted to listen to 'Dear Jamie... Sincerely Me' by Hellogoodbye (I've been craving to listen to that song for ages, so I YouTubed it), and once when we listened to Pink's (or P!nk's, I'm not sure what it is) 'Funhouse' album at Jay and Kate's. However, this was very much made up for by the fact that I didn't actually tell anybody I was only listening to European music (though I probably should have), and because we also listened to Fleetwood Mac and The Levellers.
So what have we learned about patriotism today, kids? Yes, that's right! We have learned that to be truly patriotic, you must only listen to music from your own continent! Now all I have to do is tell the whole world, and maybe all the wars will end...
Thursday, 3 December 2009
Week 49: This week, let Benrik track your location via your mobile phone
Firstly, an apology. I haven't updated much over the last few days, and won't be able to keep it up hugely well, seeing as my computer at home is completely and utterly fucked. As soon as I became Benrikian of the month, I might be souring my legacy because of my stupid computer! Grrr!!! Rest assured though, I will be keeping tasks going. I'm writing this from Uni at the moment, so until we get our home computer sorted out, updates won't be as frequent. Hopefully can sort it out as soon as possible though!
I was looking forward to this week. Benrik were to track my location, then text me impromptu tasks to do, most probably at the worst possible times. It sounded like it should have been an absolute blast, with chaos and anarchy ruling over my everyday routines. Fantastic!
So on Monday I held close to my mobile phone all day, knowing Benrik already had my number, and assuming they could probably figure out where I was via the fact that surveillance these days is fucking terrifying and is probably tracking us all every minute of the day.
I spent the evening with Jay and Kate and the babies, as we went to Asda for an immense shopping session, tried out the most tart lemon juice drink in the world, and talked at length about all having an orgy. This is true, but probably not as bad as it sounds. Then I went to theirs for a while, and we shared amazing animal facts. Well, to be honest, I shared one, but being the fountain of knowledge she is, Jay had tons. I did not know before that killer bees were a genetic experiment from scientists hybridising American and African bees. That's terrifying I think. Fuck you, scientists! And fuck you, science, whilst we're at it! Although that's only because I hated science with a passion in high school...
When I got home, I found out, unfortunately, that I could not partake in this week's task. It turns out I would need an iPhone, an Android phone (whatever that is), or a BlackBerry. I have a little, simple Nokia. I also don't have GPS facilities on my phone, or an unlimited free data contract. And, whilst my phone, like all technology in my life, is a little fucked, it does the job, and I just don't have the money to shell out loads on a new phone and new contract. Well, I do have the money. But it's Christmas. I should be buying for other people, not me.
Didn't stop me buying 'Prototype' on XBox 360 yesterday though, which is a wicked game...
Life's been a little miserable of late to be honest. I'm not really coping with the bad stuff in my life too well at the moment. Falling out with friends, having my computer crash. It's been a little depressing. Fortunately, my friends who I haven't fallen out with (not that I make a habit of it, if that's how that came across) are awesome, and are helping me through these bad times a lot. Thanks guys! There was another wicked party at Jay's on Tuesday night, which did become mildly depressing at one point, but that was my fault for dwelling on bad shit whilst in a very drunken state. But, aside from that, it was amazing. I love you guys so much!
In the absence of being able to task properly this week, I have been (very badly) attempting the bonus tasks. Will let you know how that goes in my next blog, whenever that may be...
I was looking forward to this week. Benrik were to track my location, then text me impromptu tasks to do, most probably at the worst possible times. It sounded like it should have been an absolute blast, with chaos and anarchy ruling over my everyday routines. Fantastic!
So on Monday I held close to my mobile phone all day, knowing Benrik already had my number, and assuming they could probably figure out where I was via the fact that surveillance these days is fucking terrifying and is probably tracking us all every minute of the day.
I spent the evening with Jay and Kate and the babies, as we went to Asda for an immense shopping session, tried out the most tart lemon juice drink in the world, and talked at length about all having an orgy. This is true, but probably not as bad as it sounds. Then I went to theirs for a while, and we shared amazing animal facts. Well, to be honest, I shared one, but being the fountain of knowledge she is, Jay had tons. I did not know before that killer bees were a genetic experiment from scientists hybridising American and African bees. That's terrifying I think. Fuck you, scientists! And fuck you, science, whilst we're at it! Although that's only because I hated science with a passion in high school...
When I got home, I found out, unfortunately, that I could not partake in this week's task. It turns out I would need an iPhone, an Android phone (whatever that is), or a BlackBerry. I have a little, simple Nokia. I also don't have GPS facilities on my phone, or an unlimited free data contract. And, whilst my phone, like all technology in my life, is a little fucked, it does the job, and I just don't have the money to shell out loads on a new phone and new contract. Well, I do have the money. But it's Christmas. I should be buying for other people, not me.
Didn't stop me buying 'Prototype' on XBox 360 yesterday though, which is a wicked game...
Life's been a little miserable of late to be honest. I'm not really coping with the bad stuff in my life too well at the moment. Falling out with friends, having my computer crash. It's been a little depressing. Fortunately, my friends who I haven't fallen out with (not that I make a habit of it, if that's how that came across) are awesome, and are helping me through these bad times a lot. Thanks guys! There was another wicked party at Jay's on Tuesday night, which did become mildly depressing at one point, but that was my fault for dwelling on bad shit whilst in a very drunken state. But, aside from that, it was amazing. I love you guys so much!
In the absence of being able to task properly this week, I have been (very badly) attempting the bonus tasks. Will let you know how that goes in my next blog, whenever that may be...
Monday, 30 November 2009
Sunday: Now Apply What You Have Learnt To Human Beings
First of all, I think I should mention my current pride and joy - the Benrik website newsletter has classed me as Benrikian Of The Month! I usually talk about yesterday's events in my blogs, but when I found this out a little while ago I felt I had to mention it today. I'm so proud and happy, I felt like I haven't been the best Benrikian most of the year, but I'm really trying at the moment, so I'm stoked that my efforts got noticed. Thanks, Benrik! And thanks to anyone who's commented my blogs too, much love to all! I do have to be loyal now though, I have a title to live up to... Even though I can't really do the current week's task, which I'll discuss in my next blog...
On the day I'm now chronicling, Sunday, I didn't really do the best tasking job either unfortunately, because I wasn't really sure how to go about it necessarily. But I still tried! The task was to apply what i have learned about insects to humans. Sounds simple, but I wasn't into the idea of shoving someone into a cigarette box and having them die three days later, like what happend to poor Shelly. Plus, I started the day feeling a bit upset about the current shituation (spelling error deliberate (which surely doesn't make it an error?)) my friends and I are in. And the fact that no one was home half the day, and had no plans to go out, didn't help. However, later on, and in higher spirits, my mum and littlest sister came home, so I decided to try and give the task a shot.
I started off by 'catching my human'. This involved running downstairs and grabbing Hannah (who is intensely heavy, no offense to her intended). Human caught!
For 'naming my human', I was planning to call Mum and Hannah different names throughout the day. I had Sally planned as one of them... Hmmm, where could that name have came from? Alas, I forgot to actually go through with this one. Oops.
'Feeding my human'. For this, I offered to feed Mum her lunch, and Meg her dinner, but both sadly refused. I did share a bit of my burger with Hannah though, so I guess this kind of happened.
'Hang out with your human'. Kinda depressing, but I don't really spend that much time with my family. It's nothing personal, and I love them all to bits, but I just find I have a lot of other stuff to do, and what with my weird quasi-OCD need to schedule what I do and when I do it, I sometimes don't find the time. It makes me a bit sad when I think about it, and soon I plan to do something about it, to make sure I hang out with my family a bit more. But anyway, I'm digressing (I would apologise, but this is a blog, digressing's what's often done on blogs). I spent a bit of time with my family when eating lunch and dinner, and watched some 'Friends' with Hannah. I also had a play fight with her (we are siblings after all), the usual variety where we throw cushions at each other and try to push each other off the sofa. I won! Although, as well as being freakishly heavy, she is freakishly strong too. You wouldn't think it looking at her. But then again, maybe I'm just freakishly pathetic. And you would think it looking at me...
'Loving your human'. I forgot to ask anyone for a cuddle, although I did plan to.
'Killing your human'. I smothered Mum with a pillow in her sleep. Nah, I'm just joking, in case you hadn't guessed. I didn't bring myself to kill any of my family members, despite us all joking that I was planning to kill them throughout the week. In fact, I can't even say 'I didn't bring myself to kill them' really, because the thought of genuinely killing them never entered my head. For some odd reason.
What I ultimately learned about humans from insects though, is that, sadly, we don't live for ever. Perhaps Shelly's death was a blessing in disguise, a timely reminder that people close to me will at some point die, and I will have to cope with it. They may be on a completely different scale of devastation, but it's still a lesson learned. Cheers, Shelly! She was like a really little, spindly guardian angel. Perhaps we are insects to you. I hope you can apply what you've learned about us to fellow insects in heaven. Providing what you've learned about us was good. R.I.P.
I still have her corpse waiting to be buried. Must sort that out tomorrow. I need closure, then I can stop mentioning her...
On the day I'm now chronicling, Sunday, I didn't really do the best tasking job either unfortunately, because I wasn't really sure how to go about it necessarily. But I still tried! The task was to apply what i have learned about insects to humans. Sounds simple, but I wasn't into the idea of shoving someone into a cigarette box and having them die three days later, like what happend to poor Shelly. Plus, I started the day feeling a bit upset about the current shituation (spelling error deliberate (which surely doesn't make it an error?)) my friends and I are in. And the fact that no one was home half the day, and had no plans to go out, didn't help. However, later on, and in higher spirits, my mum and littlest sister came home, so I decided to try and give the task a shot.
I started off by 'catching my human'. This involved running downstairs and grabbing Hannah (who is intensely heavy, no offense to her intended). Human caught!
For 'naming my human', I was planning to call Mum and Hannah different names throughout the day. I had Sally planned as one of them... Hmmm, where could that name have came from? Alas, I forgot to actually go through with this one. Oops.
'Feeding my human'. For this, I offered to feed Mum her lunch, and Meg her dinner, but both sadly refused. I did share a bit of my burger with Hannah though, so I guess this kind of happened.
'Hang out with your human'. Kinda depressing, but I don't really spend that much time with my family. It's nothing personal, and I love them all to bits, but I just find I have a lot of other stuff to do, and what with my weird quasi-OCD need to schedule what I do and when I do it, I sometimes don't find the time. It makes me a bit sad when I think about it, and soon I plan to do something about it, to make sure I hang out with my family a bit more. But anyway, I'm digressing (I would apologise, but this is a blog, digressing's what's often done on blogs). I spent a bit of time with my family when eating lunch and dinner, and watched some 'Friends' with Hannah. I also had a play fight with her (we are siblings after all), the usual variety where we throw cushions at each other and try to push each other off the sofa. I won! Although, as well as being freakishly heavy, she is freakishly strong too. You wouldn't think it looking at her. But then again, maybe I'm just freakishly pathetic. And you would think it looking at me...
'Loving your human'. I forgot to ask anyone for a cuddle, although I did plan to.
'Killing your human'. I smothered Mum with a pillow in her sleep. Nah, I'm just joking, in case you hadn't guessed. I didn't bring myself to kill any of my family members, despite us all joking that I was planning to kill them throughout the week. In fact, I can't even say 'I didn't bring myself to kill them' really, because the thought of genuinely killing them never entered my head. For some odd reason.
What I ultimately learned about humans from insects though, is that, sadly, we don't live for ever. Perhaps Shelly's death was a blessing in disguise, a timely reminder that people close to me will at some point die, and I will have to cope with it. They may be on a completely different scale of devastation, but it's still a lesson learned. Cheers, Shelly! She was like a really little, spindly guardian angel. Perhaps we are insects to you. I hope you can apply what you've learned about us to fellow insects in heaven. Providing what you've learned about us was good. R.I.P.
I still have her corpse waiting to be buried. Must sort that out tomorrow. I need closure, then I can stop mentioning her...
Sunday, 29 November 2009
Saturday: Kill Your Insect
Today I'm supposed to see if I can bring myself to killing my insect. I guess I was a bit hasty on this one, seeing as my insect fwiend, Shelly, died on Wednesday. Now, I don't think I killed her, and usually I'll protest to being her murderer, but if it means I completed this task... Yeah, I totally killed her!
But in all seriousness, if Shelly were alive to be part of Saturday's task, I wouldn't have killed her. I maybe would have if it was a neccessity, but seeing as one of the options given is that I couldn't bring myself to kill the insect, I'd have settled on that. I'm quite moral like that, and feel bad if I kill an insect, and start torturing myself thinking about how that insect was just about to reach the greatest moment of their life, they'd just won insect lotto, used the money to buy a Tiffany diamond ring, and was about to propose to their girlfriend... And then I kill it. What about the insect's family and friends? And potential fiancee? This is why I really can't understand how someone can kill aanother person in cold blood - a fellow being who they should understand. I realise that killing an insect and killing a person are on quite different scales, but that's not really the point. But anyway, I digress. I was way too attached to Shelly to be have been able to kill her anyway, she was a sweetheart.
So I thought maybe I could just find a random insect, and see if I could bring myself to kill it anyway. That way, I wouldn't have quite as much associated guilt as I would have if the insect were my friend. But, yeah, you guessed it, barely a bug in sight today. Sigh.
That evening I went to see 'Paranormal Activity', which I mention because no one should believe the trailers (or the people screaming and fucking crying in the cinema). It's about as scary as a handkerchief. And if you happen to have a phobia of handkerchiefs, I apologise for the poor analogy. It was a decent film, moderately entertaining and all. But, honestly, 'Drag Me To Hell' was scarier, and that film was a fucking comedy!
Movie rant over. I guess I can't judge fairly because I don't find films scary. I only find real stuff scary, things on screen don't really bother me, unless I'm watching people play 'Left 4 Dead' whilst I'm very drunk. As I did later that night.
For it was PARTY TIME!!! Party at Meech's to be exact, and, despite the fact that some fuckers did some shit that managed to upset us all, it was a really good night. There was a fly or two buzzing around at various points, and I tried to catch it/them so I could CRUSH it/them (capitals felt appropraiate), but I've never been good at catching flies, so I failed. Again. Double sigh.
There was lots of drinking, music, and 'Left 4 Dead' at the party, so all in all, a good time. I just wish people didn't have to fucking ruin it for us, but I probably shouldn't really go into all the details on a public blog, seeing as I guess it's better to just let the situation go instead of make things worse with incendiary comments. And right now, I'm feeling okay about it all, because sometimes bad stuff has to happen for good stuff to take place, and that good stuff will be even better because of it. So yeah, I'm keeping positive at the moment. And I didn't mean to end this blog on a depressing (even though it did get positive) note, but all this discussion is actually weirdly relevant to the next day's task. As you will find out tomorrow (hopefully)...
But in all seriousness, if Shelly were alive to be part of Saturday's task, I wouldn't have killed her. I maybe would have if it was a neccessity, but seeing as one of the options given is that I couldn't bring myself to kill the insect, I'd have settled on that. I'm quite moral like that, and feel bad if I kill an insect, and start torturing myself thinking about how that insect was just about to reach the greatest moment of their life, they'd just won insect lotto, used the money to buy a Tiffany diamond ring, and was about to propose to their girlfriend... And then I kill it. What about the insect's family and friends? And potential fiancee? This is why I really can't understand how someone can kill aanother person in cold blood - a fellow being who they should understand. I realise that killing an insect and killing a person are on quite different scales, but that's not really the point. But anyway, I digress. I was way too attached to Shelly to be have been able to kill her anyway, she was a sweetheart.
So I thought maybe I could just find a random insect, and see if I could bring myself to kill it anyway. That way, I wouldn't have quite as much associated guilt as I would have if the insect were my friend. But, yeah, you guessed it, barely a bug in sight today. Sigh.
That evening I went to see 'Paranormal Activity', which I mention because no one should believe the trailers (or the people screaming and fucking crying in the cinema). It's about as scary as a handkerchief. And if you happen to have a phobia of handkerchiefs, I apologise for the poor analogy. It was a decent film, moderately entertaining and all. But, honestly, 'Drag Me To Hell' was scarier, and that film was a fucking comedy!
Movie rant over. I guess I can't judge fairly because I don't find films scary. I only find real stuff scary, things on screen don't really bother me, unless I'm watching people play 'Left 4 Dead' whilst I'm very drunk. As I did later that night.
For it was PARTY TIME!!! Party at Meech's to be exact, and, despite the fact that some fuckers did some shit that managed to upset us all, it was a really good night. There was a fly or two buzzing around at various points, and I tried to catch it/them so I could CRUSH it/them (capitals felt appropraiate), but I've never been good at catching flies, so I failed. Again. Double sigh.
There was lots of drinking, music, and 'Left 4 Dead' at the party, so all in all, a good time. I just wish people didn't have to fucking ruin it for us, but I probably shouldn't really go into all the details on a public blog, seeing as I guess it's better to just let the situation go instead of make things worse with incendiary comments. And right now, I'm feeling okay about it all, because sometimes bad stuff has to happen for good stuff to take place, and that good stuff will be even better because of it. So yeah, I'm keeping positive at the moment. And I didn't mean to end this blog on a depressing (even though it did get positive) note, but all this discussion is actually weirdly relevant to the next day's task. As you will find out tomorrow (hopefully)...
Friday: Love Your Insect
My attempt at insect loving didn't go to well, it has to be said. I was merely supposed to have a nice cuddle with my insect today, and see if the insect and I enjoyed it. Seeing as my previous insect, Shelly, was very, very dead, I didn't feel like cuddling the corpse. Something just seems a little macabre about hugging a dead spider...
I had a really quite busy day on Friday too, so didn't have much time to catch a new insect fwiend. I had a full day of Uni, then a meal out later that night to celebrate Mum's birthday (happy birthday for last Friday, Mum! And happy birthday for today, Dad!). So, I really had no time at home during the day, except to get ready. After the meal I searched the house for insects. Because my house is being an insect-less shit right now, there were none... Except in the downstairs toilet, where there were two spiders. Fantastic!
Except not fantastic! Because one was dead (I have a knack for finding dead/dying spiders), and one was a slippery bastard, who I tried desperately to grab hold of, but the sprightly bugger dashed off every which way, until it eventually hid behind the sink, where I couldn't get to it! Goddamn it! I'm guessing word of Shelly's death has emerged amongst the insect world, and they're all avoiding me like the plague right now. I didn't murder her though! I bet Meg's been telling other spiders that I killed Shelly... Ignoring the fact that Meg's shit-scared of spiders for a minute...
So yeah, my tasking wasn't particularly exceptional again, but I'm guessing that the rest of this week's not gonna be easy, what with the insect-less-ness, death-ness, busy-ness, and whatever-else-ness.
But oh wells. The meal, to derail the subject, was awesome. Chinese buffet for the win! And the dessert was delightfully odd, being another buffet, this time of ice cream, cake, Chinese treats, and LOTS of pick 'n' mix. Which I guess doesn't sound too odd. But the amount of pick 'n' mix we'd had for desert made it a different-than-usual dessert. It was akin to reaping the rewards of an exploded Haribo factory. Which, I assure you, is a good thing, though possibly not for the workers/proprietors/builders of said factory.
I had a really quite busy day on Friday too, so didn't have much time to catch a new insect fwiend. I had a full day of Uni, then a meal out later that night to celebrate Mum's birthday (happy birthday for last Friday, Mum! And happy birthday for today, Dad!). So, I really had no time at home during the day, except to get ready. After the meal I searched the house for insects. Because my house is being an insect-less shit right now, there were none... Except in the downstairs toilet, where there were two spiders. Fantastic!
Except not fantastic! Because one was dead (I have a knack for finding dead/dying spiders), and one was a slippery bastard, who I tried desperately to grab hold of, but the sprightly bugger dashed off every which way, until it eventually hid behind the sink, where I couldn't get to it! Goddamn it! I'm guessing word of Shelly's death has emerged amongst the insect world, and they're all avoiding me like the plague right now. I didn't murder her though! I bet Meg's been telling other spiders that I killed Shelly... Ignoring the fact that Meg's shit-scared of spiders for a minute...
So yeah, my tasking wasn't particularly exceptional again, but I'm guessing that the rest of this week's not gonna be easy, what with the insect-less-ness, death-ness, busy-ness, and whatever-else-ness.
But oh wells. The meal, to derail the subject, was awesome. Chinese buffet for the win! And the dessert was delightfully odd, being another buffet, this time of ice cream, cake, Chinese treats, and LOTS of pick 'n' mix. Which I guess doesn't sound too odd. But the amount of pick 'n' mix we'd had for desert made it a different-than-usual dessert. It was akin to reaping the rewards of an exploded Haribo factory. Which, I assure you, is a good thing, though possibly not for the workers/proprietors/builders of said factory.
Friday, 27 November 2009
Thursday: Hang Out With Your Insect
Considering the events of yesterday's blog, I didn't do any task today, strictly speaking. I would have hung out with Shelly, but she was sadly dead, and I felt it to be a bit macabre to hang out with, and study the personality, of a dead spider. And I did have a look around my house for a new fwiend, not that I like the thought of replacing my dear Shelly, but for the purposes of my daily task. But no! Not a single insect anywhere! I mean seriously, insects are fucking everywhere when you never want them to be. But now that I actually want an insect, they are nowhere to be found! Damn you, cruel insect God! Is this your punishment unto me for Shelly's death? I DIDN'T MURDER HER (despite my sister claiming I did)!
So, even though I didn't actually do it yesterday, I had hung out with her for a bit previously, and will write a few notes on her personality. I feel that, initially, Shelly was quite introverted. She was quite scared of me, and would huddle up into a ball when I wanted to hang out. But I think that I helped her come out of her shell a little bit. As the (many) days went on, she was more playful, emerging from her house for a little run around, or mischeviously covering my fingers in webs (at least I think they were webs...). She certainly developed more personality as we spent more time together, and, if it helps, I was quite shy and scared of her at first too. But we built a beautiful bond as we socially grew together. This made her death even more sad, as I felt I was just getting to know the real Shelly. But I learned a lot about her - she was a quiet soul, scared of the big wide world around her, but all she needed was someone to show her friendship. I feel proud knowing that I gave her that (I don't feel so proud of possibly murdering her, but still).
That night, I went to Jay and Kate's again, although I wasn't in so much need of consolation this time. We had another awesome night. I farted a lot in the front room, which I feel a bit bad about. I swear I only ever need to fart when I'm in their front room. Still, I think everyone was more impressed than disgusted. I feel partly proud, and partly ashamed. Proudshamed, as I hail it!
Like the night before, we just shot the shit and chillaxed all night, which I like. Jay put the finishing touches to the first hat that she's made, and it was awesome! Really looking forward to seeing her next hat as well, in the style of Alice In Wonderland's Mad Hatter. It's gonna be wicked! We also looked at Meech's Fizz Monster stuff, which is amazing, really cool handmade jewellery and plushes. These guys are so creative! They make me jealous, but not in an envious way, in a way that I really admire their skills. Be proud guys!
I also forgot to mention on my previous blog that the night before, Meech bought me the coolest slippers in the world - motherfucking giraffe slippers! Hell yeah! I love them, they are adorable! I can't wait for Saturday night - party at Meech's with all my favourite homies!
So, even though I didn't actually do it yesterday, I had hung out with her for a bit previously, and will write a few notes on her personality. I feel that, initially, Shelly was quite introverted. She was quite scared of me, and would huddle up into a ball when I wanted to hang out. But I think that I helped her come out of her shell a little bit. As the (many) days went on, she was more playful, emerging from her house for a little run around, or mischeviously covering my fingers in webs (at least I think they were webs...). She certainly developed more personality as we spent more time together, and, if it helps, I was quite shy and scared of her at first too. But we built a beautiful bond as we socially grew together. This made her death even more sad, as I felt I was just getting to know the real Shelly. But I learned a lot about her - she was a quiet soul, scared of the big wide world around her, but all she needed was someone to show her friendship. I feel proud knowing that I gave her that (I don't feel so proud of possibly murdering her, but still).
That night, I went to Jay and Kate's again, although I wasn't in so much need of consolation this time. We had another awesome night. I farted a lot in the front room, which I feel a bit bad about. I swear I only ever need to fart when I'm in their front room. Still, I think everyone was more impressed than disgusted. I feel partly proud, and partly ashamed. Proudshamed, as I hail it!
Like the night before, we just shot the shit and chillaxed all night, which I like. Jay put the finishing touches to the first hat that she's made, and it was awesome! Really looking forward to seeing her next hat as well, in the style of Alice In Wonderland's Mad Hatter. It's gonna be wicked! We also looked at Meech's Fizz Monster stuff, which is amazing, really cool handmade jewellery and plushes. These guys are so creative! They make me jealous, but not in an envious way, in a way that I really admire their skills. Be proud guys!
I also forgot to mention on my previous blog that the night before, Meech bought me the coolest slippers in the world - motherfucking giraffe slippers! Hell yeah! I love them, they are adorable! I can't wait for Saturday night - party at Meech's with all my favourite homies!
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