It's been a while...

It's been a while since I've posted a blog, so you know what that means. It means I say that I've been incredibly lazy and haven't felt like blogging, haven't felt like tasking, haven't felt like living. It's true. I've been incredibly bored the last few weeks, doing nothing, looking for jobs, applying, never hearing back from them, feeling dejected and like I can't be bothered to look for them anymore. I have done barely anything in the last few weeks, having nothing to do has made me incredibly unmotivated. Yesterday was my birthday, and I honestly can't say I even wanted to celebrate it. But I did celebrate it, I had friends and family come over for an awesome night of drinking and eating and banter, basically, and I'm glad I did. It was a great night, despite that I fell ill at about half 1 and actually had to leave my own party. I am thankful to all my friends who came and everyone who wished me a happy birthday, and gave me lovely presents. I can't wait to watch 'Dexter' Season 2, and read 'A Book For People Who Want To Become Stinking Rich But Aren't Quite Sure How' and the Gamer's Edition of the Guinness Book of Records, and to play drums with my awesome drumstick holster, and to play 'Lego Indiana Jones 2' (when an English copy arrives, Michelle got sent an NTSC copy, curses!). And there's more presents to come too. Good times! Not that birthdays are all about presents, of course. But I kind of like the idea of still being able to celebrate your birthday a little bit after it's actually happened.

I'm 22 now. That's absolutely insane. I still feel 15 to be honest. But I feel a bit more motivated to sort my life out now. Maybe not today, because I still feel a bit shit from my mystery illness today. Hell, I've already taken some responsibility and gave the living room a thorough clean to make up for last night's messy party (that sounds a tad wrong). Okay, so I know that's not much, but considering I've pretty much spent the last few months playing XBox and using the computer, it's something. So I will get off my arse, I will make steps to get a job, and I will not let myself be walked all over - I've been dabbling in self-respect lately, it worked for Scott Pilgrim, it can work for me. Maybe.

I will start tasking again too. I have done a few mild tasks lately, which essentially boils down to studying Ada Peach's life, and increasing my pain threshold by having Jay punch my arm as hard a possible. No, I won't be tasking super hardcore or anything, but really, I never did. I just like the idea of having a little something special to do each day. I've already tasked mildly today, of which I will go more into detail on my next blog.

The fact that I'm actually writing this blog shows that I'm a bit more motivated than I have been in ages to be honest. And let's not fuck around here, I fully expect that I will probably have a lapse in motivation sometime soon, because I do this all the time. I'm a bit of a broken record, and this blog entry is an example of that, it's the archetypal entry I do when I I've already lapsed, and recovered, only to relapse at some point. Which makes me sound firstly like a drug addict, and secondly like I'm in a negative headspace. I'm not, I'm simply being realistic. But I'll try my best not to. Doing stuff is far more fulfilling than not doing stuff. Even if you try and fail, at least you tried. I will smile at the the end of a day if I know I've done SOMETHING productive. And it's been a while since that's happened to be honest. So, I'll stop starting and stopping living, just get on with my life, motivate myself, and if I do lapse, remember that it's so much rewarding to do stuff.

Also, I should probably stop rambling so much... But it's been a while... =)

Day 244: Take our test and find out if you're a psychopath

I promised myself that I would task harder in September, and, well, I haven't. Big surprise. I've had a very busy weekend to be fair, and have been super lazy since. However, I did do this test, and found out that... *Drumroll* I AM NOT A PSYCHOPATH! I am 5 points off though =s I asked Jay to answer the questions, 'cos she knows me better than anyone else, and apparently I'm near psychopathic... But I don't have to worry just yet.

I got the '101 Things You Need To Know... And Some You Don't' book the other day. While it is blatantly meant for children, I'm enjoying it, learning lots of new facts, and looking forward to taking on all the miniature tasks. I should be too old for it, but honestly, I'm a 9 year old in a 15 year old's body, who happens to have been on Earth for 21 years, so it works out great for me!

#9 - Learn That Instrument

Like I promised, I will update y'all on any Things To Do Before I Die that I have done before I die. First one first, learning an instrument! Also probably the only Thing that I've put any effort into...

When did you start to learn your instrument?: 24/10/2004. Roughly, because I think that was the year I got it.

Which instrument have you learned?: Drums

Did you have lessons as a child: No

What age were you when you started learning?: 15

I haven't written any real melodies that I can remember, although maybe I can put in some of my band's original stuff. Haven't done it yet, but will update if I do!

How loud can your instrument go?: 80 decibels (roughly)

Overall, how well do you think you play?: Very good (I'm a modest person, but you've sometimes gotta admit it when you're good at something)

How well do others think you play?: Excellent

Which other instruments can you play?: I am learning bass guitar.

What can you play?: Many, many songs

Have you written your own songs?: Not properly myself yet, but one day in the future hopefully.

Do you annoy others with your playing?: Yes, sometimes.

I haven't ever busked either, so I've left that section blank.

Your first public performance (in a band): No idea, was late last year I think though. Maybe early this year. I really should update these things as I go along.

What was your band called?: Beerwolf, and is still called such.

Where did you play?: The Railway, Ipswich

Did the gig go well?: Yes

Have you been asked back?: Yes

Days 229 - 236

Honestly; there's no point blogging about these days, because I did not do them at all. I've been extremely lazy with tasking lately. I dunno why really, maybe I'm just feeling lazy in general. Some of the tasks just don't seem fun, or require money, a commodity I am severely lacking at the moment. But mostly, I just think I've kind of resigned because I don't feel like I've been tasking well, that if I haven't been doing it properly there's no point continuing it properly. And that I want to redo all the tasks at another time, a time when I can do most of them, when I'll have the money or confidence to go through with them. Don't take this as a letter of resignation though; I will definitely continue to task when I can/can be bothered/want to. In fact, I've actually made a semblance of effort with today's task, which is something, even if all the effort so far has merely been research. But I'll let you know about that tomorrow. Or some other day, whenever I can also be bothered to blog. Like I said, lately I am very lazy. So, this is really just an apology. An excuse for my terrible life-changing. And a promise (hopefully) that one day I'll do it all properly.

Days 227 - 228

Day 227: Handcuff yourself to public fixtures today

I considered doing this one, to the extent that I actually went into town, picked up a pair of handcuffs, and considered buying them. But I decided that 1) I didn't wanna spend any money (not even the astonishing £1.49 they cost), and 2) I didn't want to handcuff myself to a public fixture. So I passed unfortunately.

Day 228: Today lobby Celine Dion to sing about you

I wrote a nice, lengthy letter to Celine Dion, telling her who I am, and that she should write a song about me because I, like her, am extremely passionate about music. Flattery gets you everywhere, so I made sure to mention that she is far superior than me in terms of talent. I've yet to send the letter, but there's no way it can fail!

101 Things To Do Before You Die

This has been a long time coming, but as well as following Benrik's diaries, I also vaguely follow a great book I bought a long time ago - '101 Things To Do Before You Die'. Like it's title may suggest, it offers up a list of, er, 101 things that would be pretty cool to do, and preferably before you die. Now, I haven't done a lot in this book, but I would like to get most of it done eventually. So, I'm starting up a blog to keep everyone up to date with the things I have done in the book.

For new followers, seeing as I will be putting this blog link on the official 101 Things website, my name is James Small. That's all you need to know about me, you'll learn the rest (maybe).

I dedicated my book to, simply, family and friends. That way no one is singled out unfairly.

At the beginning of the book is a list of things you will need. I haven't got everything on there (and never will, seeing as one of them is luck), but here's what I do and do have.

Things I have:

A pen

A pair of scissors

Glue

Money (actually, I don't really any more. This can be in both lists)

A camera

A pack of cards

Poker chips

A strong stomach

Some strangers (I guess we all have them)

Some friends

A partner

Skills (not many, but a few)

A reckless spirit (sometimes)

A world map

Condoms

Clothes

No clothes

An instrument

Various animals

Junk

A passport

A video or DVD player

A television

The sun

The moon

The stars

Fruit (Well, I don't, but I can get some)

Batteries

A good imagination

Spontaneity

A sense of humour

Things I don't have:

Money

A photocopier

Beer

A head for heights

Betting slips

A driving licence

A local map

Alcohol

A dart

A stick of chalk

A balaclava or ski mask

A celebrity

A rock star

A confessional booth

An understanding vicar

Spray cans

A van

A fast car

A bucket

Christmas decorations

An amusement park

A space shuttle

Talent

The Kama Sutra

Luck

Patience (I do sometimes)

Clear skies (I live in Britain after all)

A video camera

A golf club

A golf ball

A suit / outfit

A football

Forward planning

Optimism

These lists are very rough actually and not entirely accurate. And I can get the things I need when I need them.

Now this is just an introductory blog, so I'll go into further details on my things I've done at a later date. But, just for quick reference, and proof that I really haven't lived my life yet, here are the things I have done;

Learn that instrument

Leave your mark in graffiti

Be friends with your ex

I also have 'Design your own cocktail' listed, but I'd like to properly do this one day (ie, remember what was in the cocktail).

I'll update again soon, with exciting details on my learned instrument. Ciao for now!

Days 220 - 226

Prepare for paragraph upon paragraph of the weakest tasking ever!

Day 220: Negative Thinking Day

I forgot to think negative all day. Which worked fine for me, seeing as I had a gig with my band, and it went ace, and my drumming went really well (that's not boasting, just proudness). At the very end of the day, I feared that terrorists may fly into Nicole and Alex's house, where I was staying for the weekend. Terrorists didn't fly into the house. I conclude that both positive and negative thinking work great.

Day 221: Sabotage focus groups today

I didn't do this. I could have at least phoned the number. But I didn't.

Day 222: Today stare into other people's homes

Nor did I do this. I briefly looked into people's houses through my own windows. By briefly I mean 'passing glances', pretty much.

Day 223: Today, make friends with the geniuses of tomorrow

Guess what? Oh yeah. I didn't do this. Shame, as I went to the museum with Jay on this day, would have been a good place to find genii.

Day 224: Today, Dance with Death

Nope, none of this. I didn't want to. Nearly dying scares me more than actually dying in a weird, weird way.

Day 225: Talk to a plant for at least one hour today

I considered doing this... But couldn't be bothered. Sorry.

Day 226: Internet Vigilante Day: Today police the internet yourself

I did do this! Honestly! I went on a random college chat room (after, ingeniously, Googling 'chat rooms'), took on my vigilante handle 'Rorschach' (guess which film I'd watched just before doing this?), and policed away. I chastised people on their use of curse words, or obscene language. I picked on one girl who was CRAZY about anal sex, but she just found it funny. One girl complained of her boyfriend harassing her, so I suggested to her that she ring the police or hire me to assassinate him. Although, she seemed to be the crazy one. And there was one constant spammer sending messages about loving to watch women get fucked by dogs, and inviting us to watch it with him. I told him this was illegal, he was going to jail for distributing such material, and the woman involved in the bestiality would be too. All this between constant Watchmen discussion with a fellow fan on the message board. I think this made up for my week of bad tasking beforehand.