There's no point in me naming this blog after the week's task, 'cos I haven't even done any of it. It lives up to its title - I'm supposed to treat rich people well and poor people not so well. However, seeing as I'm pretty poor and I don't know anyone super rich, I find this a mean task. Funny, yes, but it requires me to spend less than 5 hours in the company of people with not a lot of money, which is not nice. I'll spend as much time as I want with the people I want, fuck you very much! Don't worry, I don't genuinely take this task seriously - hence why I'm not really doing it.
Monday:
Okay, I did a little bit of the task, but it was insulting Meg - I told her she didn't smell too bad for a student, which i stole directly from the book. It confused the hell out of her, and thus was very funny.
We went out to see '12 Rounds', which wasn't a good film in most terms of the word, but was a lot of fun. Very much like the 90's kind of action films I grew up on, so very enjoyable, we both had a good time watching it. I give it 3 stars!
Tuesday:
No task done. 'Cos I suck.
Went to Zanny's BBQ today, which was pretty damn dope. The sun was absolutely fucking baking today, We were all in swimming trunks and bikinis. No, that's not true. But it would have been appropraite considering the weather. The food was lush, I think we had something along the lines of 60 burgers or something. I mean, there were about that many burgers there, we didn't eat that many. Also played a bit of Guitar Hero, naturally. Zanny and I discussed starting up a band, if we can find a bassist it might well happen. Also, we listened to N.W.A. on the drive home. So, you know, that was fucking awesome.
Wednesday:
No no, no no no no, no no no no, no no there's no task no.
Had a picnic with Meech, Chloe, Meg, Chris, Jay, and Jay's babies, Annabelle and Emily. They were adorable, though they did poo a lot. We spent a while at the triangle, then went to the beach, sat in the gardens, and enjoyed our mass amounts of nosh. We threw a Jaffa Cake at a seagull (not maliciously), and, to our disbelief, it swallowed it whole. The cakey snack formed a gaint lump in the seagulls neck before it properly swallowed it all down, it was amazing. We tried to get it to happen again, but we weren't so succesful.
Then we went off to Jay and her girlfriend Kate's pad. We sat around having a laugh and listening to tunes - It was one of those simple nights that I really love, where you can just chillax and have fun. So yeah, it was awesome, a really nice night.
Thursday:
No task. Go figure.
Went to the cinema with Dave and Chloe to see 'Terminator: Salvation'. Was awesome seeing Dave again, haven't seen him in ages, he loved the belated birthday present I bought him - a Barack Obama bobblehead, natch.
My feelings on 'Terminator: Salvation'. Mixed feelings. It was good, an entertaining slice of fun. But unfortunately, it wasn't much more, which I feel the other Terminator films are. I had some problems, and the more I think about them the more they dawn on me. Firstly, it didn't feel like a Terminator film. I know this shouldn't be a major issue, but it kind of bothered me, it only felt like a Terminator film in its final scenes, and then it seemed like it was trying too hard. Ultimately, it just didn't have the soul of the other films, they all had purpose and meaning (even the third one, I think it has a beautiful ending), this one just felt like a long action scene. And it was a damn good action scene, just not exactly what I wanted. Oh well. Still fun. 4 stars!
Me and Chloe had a long convo when we got home. It was LOOOOOONG. Okay, like an hour and a bit, but still. That's pretty long. It was a nice convo, and I had a good day.
Friday:
Today task any do didn't I.
In the evening I went to the pub with Meg, Meech, Chloe and Emily, or a few pubs to be precise. I had mostly a good time, I tend to feel a little lonely in pubs, but that's more because I know it's not a good idea for me to get drunk, so I feel like an outcast sometimes. I won't rant about that now though.
Anyways, had a good night ultimately. Meg and I played pool, and Emily helped me cheat when she wasn't paying attention. Also I sent some mysrery texts to someone, but I will not explain that here in case they read this. Which they won't, but regardless. Chloe and I had fun putting on some choons on the jukebox and dancing. And I had a nice chat with Meech about spiders, which sounds unpleasant, but was pretty funny. I haven't seen Meech properly in ages, I mean like just us two, and I really miss her, I can't wait to see her on Monday.
Saturday:
Didn't do any task. I like to surprise ;)
I had a night in, so I watched 'The Broken'. It was an okay horror movie, but it was soooo slow, I'm fine with slow films, but it was easy to tell with this one that they had difficulty stretching it to 80 minutes, so just played out every scene reallllly slooooowwlllly. It was fairly creepy though, despite the plot being a little odd and the twist not making that much sense. Lena Headey was naked in it though, and, I'm not being a pervert, but that is a very good thing. 3 stars!
Sunday:
No task. I genuinely planned to do some today, but seeing as I was hanging out with friends I didn't think this would be very fair really. Ah well, whilst funny it didn't seem like a particularly interesting task anyway...
Anyways, today I hung out with Chloe and Kirstie. It was a miserable morning, but, as if God was watching over us and was a fan of our crazy antics, the weather cleared up just before we left. Chloe and I first met up and discussed Pokemon for ages. Then Kirstie came along and we went into town. We decided that I should use the sink in my room as a fishtank, and planned to go get some fish from Conkers, but, alas, it was closed! We then went to the beach for a bit, and then went to the Spar and to the clifftops for nosh. Kirstie kept taking videos on her camera today, so I invented a rap song about teethed vaginas, inspired by her ringtone, which was a song from the awful (sorry Kirstie!) movie Teeth. We headed back and Kirstie hit us with a lily that she found. She then dared me to eat it, telling me they were okay to eat...
...So I ate a bit, being the fool I am. Oops. A very itchy tongue ensued. Not nice. We all parted ways here, and when I got home I told mum about my itchy tongue. She got very worried about the fact that i ate a lily. Partly because I ate a lily at 20 years of age, but mostly because she thought they were poisonous. She went on the internet to find out for sure, and it turns out she's right. Oh dear. She then called a doctor, but I only ate a little bit, so i should be fine. Still, I'm possibly partly poisoned right now, but at least my tongue has stopped itching! A very strange day to say the least, but extremely awesome because of it...
Thanks for reading. I hope you came away from this feeling enlightened that you're not as stupid as I am...
Love,
Rivers
Thursday 4 June 2009
Monday 1 June 2009
"Change One Life" Week
Firstly, an apology, for me being a dumb shit basically. On my last blog I claimed that my family left for holiday last Saturday. Which isn't true at all, it was actually the Monday of the week I'm about to chronicle. I don't know why I thought that, and I'm probably a terrible person for not knowing this properly. I could have gone back and edited it, but we all have to face up to our mistakes, right? Right. Now you know that I'm an awful person, on with the week ahead.
Anyways, this week in my diary was "Change One Life" Week, as the observant of you may have figured from my blog title... This task required members to sign up to be a lucky Benrik reader who will have their life changed by other members. Awesome!
Monday:
All I did in relation to the task today was write up my application, which required a brief outline of my life and what needs to be changed. I probably went in to way more detail than required, but oh well. Here is said application, warts and all:
My name is James Small. I was born on 24th October 1988 in Suffolk, to a middle-class family. Unfortunately my parents divorced when I was young, though I don’t think it has affected me too much, though I don’t often see my father. I attended primary school as a child, where I was a bit rebellious, I was the class clown, but I was always friendly. After that I went to high school, where I was still a bit rebellious, but not so much so. I passed my GCSEs with decent grades. I then went on to Sixth Form where I studied Film, Media, and English. I passed Film and Media, but not English. However, my grades were good enough to take me to University, where I now study Film and Media Studies. I have just finished the second year. I have also recently discovered Benrik, which has made life quite different since…
I am a geeky, friendly, shy but fun-loving guy. I love music (most genres), films (most genres), playing drums (though I can’t find a band), writing scripts, and playing video games. I don’t have millions of friends like everyone else in the world, but the ones I do have I love to bits, and I think it's more important to have a few great friends than loads of distant friends. I am pretty much the only single person I know, and probably the only virgin too. Because of this, I do tend to get lonely, paranoid and sad sometimes, but for the most part I am a pretty happy guy. I am also a paperboy, at 20 years old, which is very lame and embarrassing, because I can’t find a job. I could blame the recession, but I’m also just pretty lazy.
What needs changing in my life: Help finding a girlfriend - I know being single isn’t that major an issue, but I feel very lonely and get jealous because all my friends have someone. I also need a decent job, and being in a band, or at least having the money to form a solo project, would help. Not that I’m asking for money, but that’s what the job is for…
Lots of love, James
Man, that's pretty brutal. Now you know about all my embarassing personal stuff. Oh well. Y'know, I'm a human being, we're all flawed. Don't judge me. Honesty is a good thing though, so we are led to believe...
My family actually DID leave for Malta today, by the way.
In the evening I went to the cinema with Chloe and we watched Tormented, which was awesome, we had such a fun time watching it. We loved the eyeball bit! I like how Chloe and I talk about everything and nothing at the same time. I can't remember exactly what we talked about today, because this was a week ago, but we always have really deep conversations next to really stupid conversations. She's my fwwwwwieeeeend ^_^
Tuesday:
I realised that I'd probably screwed myself over in this task by not signing up to the Benrik sight. As such, they wanted a photo and log-in from me. Lame. Anyways, some lady with an awesome fringe won instead. Not that I have a problem with this. She has an awesome fringe, thus deserved it. She wanted to escape her boring life, basically. Meanwhile, I had to think of a task for her...
Spent the day in my house with Meg, Chloe, Meech, Chris, Joseph and Emily. We didn't really do much except sit in the kitchen and stuff, but it was fun. We took an excursion into town to get ingredients for chocolate crunch. We wrote up a funny recipe for chocolate crunch too ('You'll need, like, a spatula', 'Add chopped adult', etc.). The chocolate crunch was super rich, but was tasty. We also got out our guinea pig, Gus, who pooed and weed on me. Fortunately guinea pigs have cute poo and wee, so I didn't mind... A very good day, I was sad when it was all over, like I always am when days out with friends end, but I guess it's for happy reasons that I feel sad.
Wednesday:
No task today. I forgot.
Went to the cinema with Meg to see Drag Me To Hell, which was awesome! I really loved it, it was an awesome throwback to Raimi's Evil Dead days for me, just over-the-top scares, laughs and gross-out. Just pure fun. Afterwards Meg and I went to Zizzi for dinner, a posh restaurant. She was worried people would think we were a couple, so I kept calling her my 'missus'. I was tempted to order stuff saying that, but I decided I was being mean enough already.
Thursday:
No task.
Spent the day with Ping and her boyfriend Tom. Unfortunately I was feeling a bit ill today, so I was a bit distant all day, but i still had a good time. I called Ping Jackie Chan at one point, which was funny. Because racism is funny. She found it funny too, so it's all okay. I love people who don't take racism offensively, because it's the only way you can really fight racism, by not being upset by the things they've said to upset you.
Was meant to be going to Betty's with some friends that night, but I still wasn't feeling well so I bailed out. As it turned out, everyone else bailed too, except Meech, who bailed out, but then changed her mind. I don't know why I'm writing all this pointless detail, I didn't wanna lie I guess. Anyways, I was sad I missed the karaoke night, but oh wells.
Friday:
No task. I'm good, me.
In the day I went to the cinema with Chloe and Dayna and we had a lush double bill - Star Trek and Drag Me To Hell. YASSSSSS! Chloe and I laughed at stupid bits of Star Trek, like when old Spock's voice slowed down, and Kirk's face when he was exiled onto that snow planet. Good times. We also got McDonalds, thanks to Dayna generously giving us some rather nice Maccy D vouchers.
That night I hung out with Kirstie, whom I hadn't seen in ages. It was nice to catch up with her, we just went for a walk and kept spazzing over summer and birthdays. We're thinking about starting up a band, we discussed this while singing along to Reuben songs. If that happens it'll be awesome! We also took photos, there were some epic ones of me being a spastic. As if I could be anything else.
Saturday:
I actually did some task! Woo! I sent a challenge for awesomely-befringed lady. In her description she said she wanted a way out which didn't require lobotomy... So I suggested trepanning instead. I said that she should go to the doctor's, convince them she needs trepanning, and see how far she can get them to go along with it. I was quite proud of this idea.
I watched The Orphanage, which Chloe kindly lent to me. It was a really good film, it took me a bit to get into, because I'm not one for slow-paced ghost stories usually, but it was well worth it, there were some incredible scenes, not least the ending. I'd be lying if I said I didn't let out a few tears at the end, it was beautiful, ambiguous, sad, and redemptive. All at the same time. Loved it.
Sunday:
I don't think my task got picked. Sad times. I tried to apply for the Benrik website, but it wouldn't let me log-in. Jesus Christ. I can never be a true Benrikian. Oh well, it's probably some weird trick they're playing to fuck with me.
That night I watched The Children, which was a bit shit. It was slow, dull, not as gory as it should have been, and nor was it funny. It was a hard enough idea to take seriously (kids get some disease that makes them murderous), so a little bit of humour wouldn't have gone amiss. But no, there was none of that. Just plain dull really.
That's it for that week. I'm gonna try and update more frequently from now on, I don't like having to write my whole week in one big block. Just thought I'd let you know =)
Love,
xoxox
Anyways, this week in my diary was "Change One Life" Week, as the observant of you may have figured from my blog title... This task required members to sign up to be a lucky Benrik reader who will have their life changed by other members. Awesome!
Monday:
All I did in relation to the task today was write up my application, which required a brief outline of my life and what needs to be changed. I probably went in to way more detail than required, but oh well. Here is said application, warts and all:
My name is James Small. I was born on 24th October 1988 in Suffolk, to a middle-class family. Unfortunately my parents divorced when I was young, though I don’t think it has affected me too much, though I don’t often see my father. I attended primary school as a child, where I was a bit rebellious, I was the class clown, but I was always friendly. After that I went to high school, where I was still a bit rebellious, but not so much so. I passed my GCSEs with decent grades. I then went on to Sixth Form where I studied Film, Media, and English. I passed Film and Media, but not English. However, my grades were good enough to take me to University, where I now study Film and Media Studies. I have just finished the second year. I have also recently discovered Benrik, which has made life quite different since…
I am a geeky, friendly, shy but fun-loving guy. I love music (most genres), films (most genres), playing drums (though I can’t find a band), writing scripts, and playing video games. I don’t have millions of friends like everyone else in the world, but the ones I do have I love to bits, and I think it's more important to have a few great friends than loads of distant friends. I am pretty much the only single person I know, and probably the only virgin too. Because of this, I do tend to get lonely, paranoid and sad sometimes, but for the most part I am a pretty happy guy. I am also a paperboy, at 20 years old, which is very lame and embarrassing, because I can’t find a job. I could blame the recession, but I’m also just pretty lazy.
What needs changing in my life: Help finding a girlfriend - I know being single isn’t that major an issue, but I feel very lonely and get jealous because all my friends have someone. I also need a decent job, and being in a band, or at least having the money to form a solo project, would help. Not that I’m asking for money, but that’s what the job is for…
Lots of love, James
Man, that's pretty brutal. Now you know about all my embarassing personal stuff. Oh well. Y'know, I'm a human being, we're all flawed. Don't judge me. Honesty is a good thing though, so we are led to believe...
My family actually DID leave for Malta today, by the way.
In the evening I went to the cinema with Chloe and we watched Tormented, which was awesome, we had such a fun time watching it. We loved the eyeball bit! I like how Chloe and I talk about everything and nothing at the same time. I can't remember exactly what we talked about today, because this was a week ago, but we always have really deep conversations next to really stupid conversations. She's my fwwwwwieeeeend ^_^
Tuesday:
I realised that I'd probably screwed myself over in this task by not signing up to the Benrik sight. As such, they wanted a photo and log-in from me. Lame. Anyways, some lady with an awesome fringe won instead. Not that I have a problem with this. She has an awesome fringe, thus deserved it. She wanted to escape her boring life, basically. Meanwhile, I had to think of a task for her...
Spent the day in my house with Meg, Chloe, Meech, Chris, Joseph and Emily. We didn't really do much except sit in the kitchen and stuff, but it was fun. We took an excursion into town to get ingredients for chocolate crunch. We wrote up a funny recipe for chocolate crunch too ('You'll need, like, a spatula', 'Add chopped adult', etc.). The chocolate crunch was super rich, but was tasty. We also got out our guinea pig, Gus, who pooed and weed on me. Fortunately guinea pigs have cute poo and wee, so I didn't mind... A very good day, I was sad when it was all over, like I always am when days out with friends end, but I guess it's for happy reasons that I feel sad.
Wednesday:
No task today. I forgot.
Went to the cinema with Meg to see Drag Me To Hell, which was awesome! I really loved it, it was an awesome throwback to Raimi's Evil Dead days for me, just over-the-top scares, laughs and gross-out. Just pure fun. Afterwards Meg and I went to Zizzi for dinner, a posh restaurant. She was worried people would think we were a couple, so I kept calling her my 'missus'. I was tempted to order stuff saying that, but I decided I was being mean enough already.
Thursday:
No task.
Spent the day with Ping and her boyfriend Tom. Unfortunately I was feeling a bit ill today, so I was a bit distant all day, but i still had a good time. I called Ping Jackie Chan at one point, which was funny. Because racism is funny. She found it funny too, so it's all okay. I love people who don't take racism offensively, because it's the only way you can really fight racism, by not being upset by the things they've said to upset you.
Was meant to be going to Betty's with some friends that night, but I still wasn't feeling well so I bailed out. As it turned out, everyone else bailed too, except Meech, who bailed out, but then changed her mind. I don't know why I'm writing all this pointless detail, I didn't wanna lie I guess. Anyways, I was sad I missed the karaoke night, but oh wells.
Friday:
No task. I'm good, me.
In the day I went to the cinema with Chloe and Dayna and we had a lush double bill - Star Trek and Drag Me To Hell. YASSSSSS! Chloe and I laughed at stupid bits of Star Trek, like when old Spock's voice slowed down, and Kirk's face when he was exiled onto that snow planet. Good times. We also got McDonalds, thanks to Dayna generously giving us some rather nice Maccy D vouchers.
That night I hung out with Kirstie, whom I hadn't seen in ages. It was nice to catch up with her, we just went for a walk and kept spazzing over summer and birthdays. We're thinking about starting up a band, we discussed this while singing along to Reuben songs. If that happens it'll be awesome! We also took photos, there were some epic ones of me being a spastic. As if I could be anything else.
Saturday:
I actually did some task! Woo! I sent a challenge for awesomely-befringed lady. In her description she said she wanted a way out which didn't require lobotomy... So I suggested trepanning instead. I said that she should go to the doctor's, convince them she needs trepanning, and see how far she can get them to go along with it. I was quite proud of this idea.
I watched The Orphanage, which Chloe kindly lent to me. It was a really good film, it took me a bit to get into, because I'm not one for slow-paced ghost stories usually, but it was well worth it, there were some incredible scenes, not least the ending. I'd be lying if I said I didn't let out a few tears at the end, it was beautiful, ambiguous, sad, and redemptive. All at the same time. Loved it.
Sunday:
I don't think my task got picked. Sad times. I tried to apply for the Benrik website, but it wouldn't let me log-in. Jesus Christ. I can never be a true Benrikian. Oh well, it's probably some weird trick they're playing to fuck with me.
That night I watched The Children, which was a bit shit. It was slow, dull, not as gory as it should have been, and nor was it funny. It was a hard enough idea to take seriously (kids get some disease that makes them murderous), so a little bit of humour wouldn't have gone amiss. But no, there was none of that. Just plain dull really.
That's it for that week. I'm gonna try and update more frequently from now on, I don't like having to write my whole week in one big block. Just thought I'd let you know =)
Love,
xoxox
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