YASSSSS!!! I've been looking forward to this week. Why? Well, I get to make friends with an insect! YASSSS!!!! I've been a lifelong friend to the insects - I often attract little 'fwiends', as I like to call them. Usually they're flying insects. But still. I just liked the idea of being friends with an insect.
Plus, the picture of the caterpillar on the page is fucking adorable!
Also, this is a task which seperates out smaller tasks onto seperate days, which I liked. So this is Monday, where I was simply required to catch my insect fwiend.
I initially wanted to make friends with a caterpillar, simply because of the adorable caterpillar in the Diary. However, I realised that caterpillars don't often come by these parts, so would be quite a challenge to find. Before I went about catching an insect though, I had to make sure it had a little house to stay in. I needed something small, and air-holeable (yes, that is a real word. I insist it is). I decided a cigarette box would be a good size, roughly. So I used a cigarette box. I don't smoke, but I still had the cigarette box left over from chain-smoking during Ugly Week, which I never blogged about. I gave the insects new house some airholes by using a needle and some pinpoint (see what I did there? Eh? Eh?) precision. I intended to keep the top of the box usually open anyway, but I didn't want my insect escaping at night time. Also, I sprayed the box/house with deodorant to make it smell nice, but this didn't last long. It still smells fucking horrible. But I tried. The house also has a picture of lung cancer on the back, which isn't all too pleasant. I'm sorry little fwiend, if I can find you a better house you will have a better house!
Finding an insect was the tricky part. I found but two in the house (my house, that is, not the insect's house) - a dead-looking spider in the living room, and a weird-looking spider in the kitchen. I decided to go for the dead-looking spider, as it seemed slightly safer. It's worth knowing that I'm mildly scared of spiders. Not overtly so, but big ones definitely freak me out. Fortunately, this one was tiny. It was really fucking high up though, so it took some effort to get it down. After multiple failed attempts I ended up using one of those squeezy robot arm toy things (I'm good at descriptions) to get it down. I inhabited it safely in it's home, and... well. Didn't do much with it. It was curled up into a ball and didn't do anything. Yup, it was dead.
However, a saving grace came along when I saw a nice, slightly big spider crawling on the front door later that night. YASSSS!!! So I scooped up the little fella. It seemed scared at first, and refused to come out of a ball. However, it definitely wasn't dead. I feel like I didn't make the best first impression, I should have been more gentle, but was mildly scared. But then, that's one of the purposes of this activity, to become friends with something that is not initially likeable.
But I would never befriend a slug. No way. Seriously, fuck slugs and all that they stand for.
But you're not a slug, lil' spider friend! And I promise I will be more gentle with you and learn to love you! In fact I'd already grown slightly attached. I tucked my eight-legged friend up (so, kept it in it's box, basically), and even said goodnight and blew it a kiss.
I think this could be the start of a beautiful friendship...
Tuesday, 24 November 2009
Monday, 23 November 2009
Week 47: Non-verbal communication week
I was not looking forward to this week, to be honest. The task for this week was for all communication to be... well, non-verbal. So I wouldn't be able to speak. Not fun. Well, I truly went all out this week and... spoke. A lot. Sorry, Benrik!
The thing was, I had no good days to do this. On Monday I went to the cinema with Amanda. On Tuesday I had to prepare a presentation, then went to Jay and Kate's. On Wednesday I went to Jamie's. On Thursday I had to do a presentation, then went to a party. On Friday, I had to do group work in class. On Saturday I had band practice and then went to see Nicole and Alex, then later saw Jay, Meech and Kate. And on Sunday I went to the cinema with those last three lovely people. Yes, I could have attempted to do this around my friends, but, quite frankly, didn't want to. I wanted to talk to them. So I did.
I actually attempted it on Wednesday, when I had a free day planned. Meg broke the news to me though that she was losing one of her jobs, and, as hard as I tried not to, I felt it would be more appropriate to speak. So I spent about fifteen minutes succesfully non-verbally communicating. I was also gonna try Friday, but I'd planned to see Rosie on the bus, and was too hungover to give a shit about the task. Still, I did ten minutes!
These ten minutes were when I spoke to Meg on the morning of Wednesday. Okay, so the attempt at non-verbal communication was fucked from the outset, seeing as Meg knocked on the bathroom door whilst I was taking a shower, demanding I hurry up and asking when I'd be ready. Well, I can't really non-verbally communicate if she can't see me, and I can't really text her if I'm in the shower. But then, I thought, in the Diary it says, and I quote, "Only speak if strictly necessary". So I guess this was sort of necessary.
After that, I went to see Meg, showing her the Diary so she could see why I wasn't speaking. She immediately broke the news of her losing her job, but I stayed silent, communicating (poorly) with hand gestures and the occasional written word. At one point she said that it was kind of hard to have a conversation with me while I was staying completely silent, so I decided to speak. I spoke about this for a bit, and after Meg left, I decided I would spend the rest of the day silent. But, lo and behold, I get a phone call. I picked it up and stayed initially silent to see if they'd still reply (is it possible to reply to something that's never been said?) But I felt bad, so I spoke. It was my friend Jamie, and he asked if I wanted to come over to his later. I said yes, and declared that my attempted non-verbal communication day was completely fucked. Oh well. I gave it a shot, which is more than I can say for a lot of the previous weeks.
The Diary handily had a page to write down things I found I couldn't communicate without words (pre-written examples on page: "Help, police!" and "I'd like to remortgage on the 7.9% rate APR") and things I found I could communicate without words (examples: "Nice weather we're having", "I fancy you", and "I want a divorce").
Things I found I could not communicate without words:
"What will become of Dawn's?"
Talking from the shower
Having an important conversation
Things I found I could communicate non-verbally:
"I had to talk to you while in the shower." (Took some effort to get across though.)
"I love you too." (This wasn't incestuous, it was in reply to something she saw on Facebook.)
"I will not do this all week. Just today."
That last one is what I said when talking about doing this task. Alas, I lied. I should have said "I will not do this all week. Just over the next ten minutes. Badly."
The thing was, I had no good days to do this. On Monday I went to the cinema with Amanda. On Tuesday I had to prepare a presentation, then went to Jay and Kate's. On Wednesday I went to Jamie's. On Thursday I had to do a presentation, then went to a party. On Friday, I had to do group work in class. On Saturday I had band practice and then went to see Nicole and Alex, then later saw Jay, Meech and Kate. And on Sunday I went to the cinema with those last three lovely people. Yes, I could have attempted to do this around my friends, but, quite frankly, didn't want to. I wanted to talk to them. So I did.
I actually attempted it on Wednesday, when I had a free day planned. Meg broke the news to me though that she was losing one of her jobs, and, as hard as I tried not to, I felt it would be more appropriate to speak. So I spent about fifteen minutes succesfully non-verbally communicating. I was also gonna try Friday, but I'd planned to see Rosie on the bus, and was too hungover to give a shit about the task. Still, I did ten minutes!
These ten minutes were when I spoke to Meg on the morning of Wednesday. Okay, so the attempt at non-verbal communication was fucked from the outset, seeing as Meg knocked on the bathroom door whilst I was taking a shower, demanding I hurry up and asking when I'd be ready. Well, I can't really non-verbally communicate if she can't see me, and I can't really text her if I'm in the shower. But then, I thought, in the Diary it says, and I quote, "Only speak if strictly necessary". So I guess this was sort of necessary.
After that, I went to see Meg, showing her the Diary so she could see why I wasn't speaking. She immediately broke the news of her losing her job, but I stayed silent, communicating (poorly) with hand gestures and the occasional written word. At one point she said that it was kind of hard to have a conversation with me while I was staying completely silent, so I decided to speak. I spoke about this for a bit, and after Meg left, I decided I would spend the rest of the day silent. But, lo and behold, I get a phone call. I picked it up and stayed initially silent to see if they'd still reply (is it possible to reply to something that's never been said?) But I felt bad, so I spoke. It was my friend Jamie, and he asked if I wanted to come over to his later. I said yes, and declared that my attempted non-verbal communication day was completely fucked. Oh well. I gave it a shot, which is more than I can say for a lot of the previous weeks.
The Diary handily had a page to write down things I found I couldn't communicate without words (pre-written examples on page: "Help, police!" and "I'd like to remortgage on the 7.9% rate APR") and things I found I could communicate without words (examples: "Nice weather we're having", "I fancy you", and "I want a divorce").
Things I found I could not communicate without words:
"What will become of Dawn's?"
Talking from the shower
Having an important conversation
Things I found I could communicate non-verbally:
"I had to talk to you while in the shower." (Took some effort to get across though.)
"I love you too." (This wasn't incestuous, it was in reply to something she saw on Facebook.)
"I will not do this all week. Just today."
That last one is what I said when talking about doing this task. Alas, I lied. I should have said "I will not do this all week. Just over the next ten minutes. Badly."
Monday, 16 November 2009
Music Review: Jesu - 'Opiate Sun' CD
If you know me, you know Jesu. Well, you might not know them, but you'll know of them, due to the fact that I never shut the fuck up about them. They are my favourite band, and have been since I first heard 'Tired Of Me' back in 2005. That's nearly five years of me never shutting the fuck about them.
The problem is, most recent releases haven't necessarily been the greatest. 'Infinity', released a few months ago, was an amazing song, definitely, but considering it was 50 minutes in length, should have been one of Jesu's greatest. And alas, it wasn't. A definite grower, but it can't quite rival the emotional intensity of the self-titled debut album, or the meticulously crafted experimental pop of 'Silver' or 'Conqueror', or the psychedelic pounding beats of some of Jesu's more electronica-influenced work.
But then, that's one of the things that makes Jesu so exciting - You can never be sure what their next release will sound like. They've travelled through shoegaze, pop, metal, indie, ambient, electronica, and even a bit of pop-punk, country, and glitched-up IDM. The latest Jesu release, 'Opiate Sun', featuring main man Justin K Broadrick solo, follows a more shoegaze/indie inspired sound. Which is awesome, but is a bit of a letdown after the experimentalism of some recent releases.
The EP starts with 'Losing Streak', the best track on the record. It's very poppy, with an incredibly catchy refrain, and features one of Jesu's more beautiful moments in the lead-in to the chorus. Unfortunately the following tracks can't quite live up to this.
'Opiate Sun', the track, is lovely, but not necessarily memorable, though it does hold an impressively catchy vocal melody. 'Deflated' fares a bit better, being, again, very catchy, and has an impressive, if slightly overlong outro. 'Morning Light' harkens back to the debut album, with a very slow, heavy guitar pounding away over a more mournful, clean guitar sound. Again, very good, but not too memorable.
The Daymare Records edition, which I'm reviewing, ends with a bonus track - A demo version of 'Deflated'. This actually fares a bit better than the original, even if it is slightly unfinished. It's less heavy, and allows you to focus more on the melodies, and throws in a nice piano line too. One of my favourite vocal lines from the original is replaced by channel-hopping dreamy guitar distortion (think a post-rock 'Interstellar Overdrive'). Both sections are very good, though I prefer the vocal version best.
The production here is another problem. The album 'Jesu' featured an extremely heavy, but sometimes overly distorted sound, which was no doubt intended, but led to a lot of clipping. After a bunch of flawless Jesu productions, this feels like a step back, with, yup, lots of clipping. It's just a bit too noisy when it should have been a bit more low-key, in my opinion.
All this sounds very negative. And trust me, it kills me to write an even slightly negative Jesu review. But it is a good EP, just not as essential as the other Jesu releases. It's definitely a grower, and is extremely consistent. And 'Losing Streak' really is a masterpiece.
Plus, Broadrick's vocals are at their absolute strongest here. One thing to be said for each subsequent Jesu release is that the vocals constantly get better, and this is no exception. In fact, some of the prettiest melodies on the release are courtesy of some breath-taking harmonies, especially on the first three tracks.
It's an interesting excursion for the Jesu project, just one I hope doesn't outstay it's welcome.
Plus, it's worth remembering, a lesser Jesu release is the equivalent to a great album by any other band.
4/5
The problem is, most recent releases haven't necessarily been the greatest. 'Infinity', released a few months ago, was an amazing song, definitely, but considering it was 50 minutes in length, should have been one of Jesu's greatest. And alas, it wasn't. A definite grower, but it can't quite rival the emotional intensity of the self-titled debut album, or the meticulously crafted experimental pop of 'Silver' or 'Conqueror', or the psychedelic pounding beats of some of Jesu's more electronica-influenced work.
But then, that's one of the things that makes Jesu so exciting - You can never be sure what their next release will sound like. They've travelled through shoegaze, pop, metal, indie, ambient, electronica, and even a bit of pop-punk, country, and glitched-up IDM. The latest Jesu release, 'Opiate Sun', featuring main man Justin K Broadrick solo, follows a more shoegaze/indie inspired sound. Which is awesome, but is a bit of a letdown after the experimentalism of some recent releases.
The EP starts with 'Losing Streak', the best track on the record. It's very poppy, with an incredibly catchy refrain, and features one of Jesu's more beautiful moments in the lead-in to the chorus. Unfortunately the following tracks can't quite live up to this.
'Opiate Sun', the track, is lovely, but not necessarily memorable, though it does hold an impressively catchy vocal melody. 'Deflated' fares a bit better, being, again, very catchy, and has an impressive, if slightly overlong outro. 'Morning Light' harkens back to the debut album, with a very slow, heavy guitar pounding away over a more mournful, clean guitar sound. Again, very good, but not too memorable.
The Daymare Records edition, which I'm reviewing, ends with a bonus track - A demo version of 'Deflated'. This actually fares a bit better than the original, even if it is slightly unfinished. It's less heavy, and allows you to focus more on the melodies, and throws in a nice piano line too. One of my favourite vocal lines from the original is replaced by channel-hopping dreamy guitar distortion (think a post-rock 'Interstellar Overdrive'). Both sections are very good, though I prefer the vocal version best.
The production here is another problem. The album 'Jesu' featured an extremely heavy, but sometimes overly distorted sound, which was no doubt intended, but led to a lot of clipping. After a bunch of flawless Jesu productions, this feels like a step back, with, yup, lots of clipping. It's just a bit too noisy when it should have been a bit more low-key, in my opinion.
All this sounds very negative. And trust me, it kills me to write an even slightly negative Jesu review. But it is a good EP, just not as essential as the other Jesu releases. It's definitely a grower, and is extremely consistent. And 'Losing Streak' really is a masterpiece.
Plus, Broadrick's vocals are at their absolute strongest here. One thing to be said for each subsequent Jesu release is that the vocals constantly get better, and this is no exception. In fact, some of the prettiest melodies on the release are courtesy of some breath-taking harmonies, especially on the first three tracks.
It's an interesting excursion for the Jesu project, just one I hope doesn't outstay it's welcome.
Plus, it's worth remembering, a lesser Jesu release is the equivalent to a great album by any other band.
4/5
Week 46: This week, dig your own grave
So, I finally did one of my tasks assigned to me by 'This Diary Will Change Your Life 2009' this week. I did indeed dig my own grave!
Well, I kind of pussied out. But these tasks are about thinking outside the box anyway. But then, I suppose, I thought inside the box this time. A box... OF ASHES!!! Yup, I realised that I don't want to be buried anyway, I would either like to be cremated, or, if I die of a mysterious, rare illness such as eyebrow cancer, have my body donated to science.
But assuming I want to be cremated, I decided I would dig a hole big enough to fit my ashes in. This is a true, and morbidly funny story; My Grandma from my Dad's side was a big fan of Ipswich Town Football Club, so she was buried under the football grounds. Thing was, her ashes were in an egg box, with sellotape around it. I'm not quite sure why the ashes were in an egg box, but we all found it amusing, despite the sadness of her death. She would have laughed too, because she had a great sense of humour. And without trying to derail this entry, I've been thinking about her a lot lately, and I really miss her. But I will save that for another time, because I don't want was intended to be an amusing article to be horribly depressing. I love you and miss you, Grandma, R.I.P.
Sorry about that. It all just came into my head, and I just wanted to write it down. Damn my stream of consciousness! Plus, I'm listening to a horribly depressing song right now, probably didn't help. Anyways, on with the grave digging! Anyways, as a tribute to my Grandma, I decided that my 'grave' would have to be the size of an egg box, roughly. And an egg box would be roughly the size of my shoe, give a few inches. So, I dug a hole in the back garden (with Mum's permission of course), and made sure it was big enough to fit my shoe in. Despite it being a tiny, tiny hole, digging was fucking hard work. But I kept at it. And now my grave is in my own back garden! I also took photos, just in case no one believes me, but there is no space on my computer, so I haven't been able to upload them. Sorry!
So yeah, I didn't follow the Diary's instructions explicitly. I didn't, consider the spade to be used, or wear proper boots, or lie in my own grave with a notepad, reflect on my own life and think about to do with the rest of it. Lying in it would have been a physical improbability too, but I did, theoretically, have one foot in the grave (see what I did there!) But I dug my own grave. So I actually did a task for once. Go me!
Well, I kind of pussied out. But these tasks are about thinking outside the box anyway. But then, I suppose, I thought inside the box this time. A box... OF ASHES!!! Yup, I realised that I don't want to be buried anyway, I would either like to be cremated, or, if I die of a mysterious, rare illness such as eyebrow cancer, have my body donated to science.
But assuming I want to be cremated, I decided I would dig a hole big enough to fit my ashes in. This is a true, and morbidly funny story; My Grandma from my Dad's side was a big fan of Ipswich Town Football Club, so she was buried under the football grounds. Thing was, her ashes were in an egg box, with sellotape around it. I'm not quite sure why the ashes were in an egg box, but we all found it amusing, despite the sadness of her death. She would have laughed too, because she had a great sense of humour. And without trying to derail this entry, I've been thinking about her a lot lately, and I really miss her. But I will save that for another time, because I don't want was intended to be an amusing article to be horribly depressing. I love you and miss you, Grandma, R.I.P.
Sorry about that. It all just came into my head, and I just wanted to write it down. Damn my stream of consciousness! Plus, I'm listening to a horribly depressing song right now, probably didn't help. Anyways, on with the grave digging! Anyways, as a tribute to my Grandma, I decided that my 'grave' would have to be the size of an egg box, roughly. And an egg box would be roughly the size of my shoe, give a few inches. So, I dug a hole in the back garden (with Mum's permission of course), and made sure it was big enough to fit my shoe in. Despite it being a tiny, tiny hole, digging was fucking hard work. But I kept at it. And now my grave is in my own back garden! I also took photos, just in case no one believes me, but there is no space on my computer, so I haven't been able to upload them. Sorry!
So yeah, I didn't follow the Diary's instructions explicitly. I didn't, consider the spade to be used, or wear proper boots, or lie in my own grave with a notepad, reflect on my own life and think about to do with the rest of it. Lying in it would have been a physical improbability too, but I did, theoretically, have one foot in the grave (see what I did there!) But I dug my own grave. So I actually did a task for once. Go me!
Tuesday, 10 November 2009
The Return Of My So-Called 'Return'...
Hello all! I haven't posted here in a long time, partly because I haven't done any of my 'tasks' in a long time. Partly because I have a Twitter now and I can post most of my little musings on there (http://twitter.com/deadlyrivers if anyone's wondering, although I'm perfectly aware no one's reading this. But I like to live in my own little fantasy of sorts that someone is reading this...). But, let's not bullshit here, mostly because I'm lazy.
'Tsk tsk, naughty boy, why haven't you been doing your all important tasks?' I hear you nag. Well, partly because they've gotten ridiculously ridiculous (Communism Week, in theory, requires me to split my student loan amongst every reader of the diary. I'm a generous guy, but I need my loan to liiiiive). Partly because they haven't been too interesting. But, let's not bullshit here, mostly because I'm lazy.
This week I'm supposed to dig my own grave. I doubt very much that I will do this, but I'll take some meager steps. Like phone up the proprietors of the Felixstowe Grove and ask if I have their permission to dig a grave in their premises. Does the Grove even have proprietors? Who knows? Will I even get around to phoning if they do? Probably not. But it's the thought that counts as the old adage goes. I have taken one meager step. I Googled the Felixstowe Grove. Go me! *Thumbs up, cheesy grin*
So, why am I back? Well, I've been wanting to blog again for a while, but time constraints/laziness have gone against my plans. But, yeah, I'm back now, even if I'll probably give up again after a few weeks. I'll try not to. Promise.
Do I even have much to blog about today? No, not really. Life since my last blog has been fucking goooooood. My birthday was awesome, possibly my best birthday ever, plus I got closer (platonically) to someone who gave me shitloads of confidence, I'm not even sure why, I guess she just made me feel like a good person. And she's been through a lot of stuff and come out of it smiling. Inspirational stuff, made me realise that (cliche alert) life is for living. You get nowhere just standing in the corner, so you might as well step out and... Y'know. Cliched stuff. I've been making friends, chatting to checkout people, generally just trying to ignore my fears and just go for it. I haven't been happier in a long time. Probably not interesting to anyone. But, I figured I should fill in the blanks since my last blog entry. And hopefully inspire someone else out there to just go for it too (aiming high, I know). I'm still shy, I'm still awkward, but I don't really care so much. I'd rather just be me than have to hide me.
Anyways, enough with my self-help/extreme-narcicism (I'm kidding, hopefully it didn't come off that way). I don't have much else to blog about right now. I intend to use this to go back to writing about my exploits, musings, reviews, etc. Plus, it gives me a good oppertunity to expand on my Tweets (140 words? Seriously? Keeps things concise, but oddly claustrophobic (in a textual way that is (I love brackets))). So yeah, this is just a way-overblown announcement of my return to the blogosphere basically...
Speak to y'all soon!
xoxox
'Tsk tsk, naughty boy, why haven't you been doing your all important tasks?' I hear you nag. Well, partly because they've gotten ridiculously ridiculous (Communism Week, in theory, requires me to split my student loan amongst every reader of the diary. I'm a generous guy, but I need my loan to liiiiive). Partly because they haven't been too interesting. But, let's not bullshit here, mostly because I'm lazy.
This week I'm supposed to dig my own grave. I doubt very much that I will do this, but I'll take some meager steps. Like phone up the proprietors of the Felixstowe Grove and ask if I have their permission to dig a grave in their premises. Does the Grove even have proprietors? Who knows? Will I even get around to phoning if they do? Probably not. But it's the thought that counts as the old adage goes. I have taken one meager step. I Googled the Felixstowe Grove. Go me! *Thumbs up, cheesy grin*
So, why am I back? Well, I've been wanting to blog again for a while, but time constraints/laziness have gone against my plans. But, yeah, I'm back now, even if I'll probably give up again after a few weeks. I'll try not to. Promise.
Do I even have much to blog about today? No, not really. Life since my last blog has been fucking goooooood. My birthday was awesome, possibly my best birthday ever, plus I got closer (platonically) to someone who gave me shitloads of confidence, I'm not even sure why, I guess she just made me feel like a good person. And she's been through a lot of stuff and come out of it smiling. Inspirational stuff, made me realise that (cliche alert) life is for living. You get nowhere just standing in the corner, so you might as well step out and... Y'know. Cliched stuff. I've been making friends, chatting to checkout people, generally just trying to ignore my fears and just go for it. I haven't been happier in a long time. Probably not interesting to anyone. But, I figured I should fill in the blanks since my last blog entry. And hopefully inspire someone else out there to just go for it too (aiming high, I know). I'm still shy, I'm still awkward, but I don't really care so much. I'd rather just be me than have to hide me.
Anyways, enough with my self-help/extreme-narcicism (I'm kidding, hopefully it didn't come off that way). I don't have much else to blog about right now. I intend to use this to go back to writing about my exploits, musings, reviews, etc. Plus, it gives me a good oppertunity to expand on my Tweets (140 words? Seriously? Keeps things concise, but oddly claustrophobic (in a textual way that is (I love brackets))). So yeah, this is just a way-overblown announcement of my return to the blogosphere basically...
Speak to y'all soon!
xoxox
Thursday, 4 June 2009
Treat People According To How Much Money They Have Week
There's no point in me naming this blog after the week's task, 'cos I haven't even done any of it. It lives up to its title - I'm supposed to treat rich people well and poor people not so well. However, seeing as I'm pretty poor and I don't know anyone super rich, I find this a mean task. Funny, yes, but it requires me to spend less than 5 hours in the company of people with not a lot of money, which is not nice. I'll spend as much time as I want with the people I want, fuck you very much! Don't worry, I don't genuinely take this task seriously - hence why I'm not really doing it.
Monday:
Okay, I did a little bit of the task, but it was insulting Meg - I told her she didn't smell too bad for a student, which i stole directly from the book. It confused the hell out of her, and thus was very funny.
We went out to see '12 Rounds', which wasn't a good film in most terms of the word, but was a lot of fun. Very much like the 90's kind of action films I grew up on, so very enjoyable, we both had a good time watching it. I give it 3 stars!
Tuesday:
No task done. 'Cos I suck.
Went to Zanny's BBQ today, which was pretty damn dope. The sun was absolutely fucking baking today, We were all in swimming trunks and bikinis. No, that's not true. But it would have been appropraite considering the weather. The food was lush, I think we had something along the lines of 60 burgers or something. I mean, there were about that many burgers there, we didn't eat that many. Also played a bit of Guitar Hero, naturally. Zanny and I discussed starting up a band, if we can find a bassist it might well happen. Also, we listened to N.W.A. on the drive home. So, you know, that was fucking awesome.
Wednesday:
No no, no no no no, no no no no, no no there's no task no.
Had a picnic with Meech, Chloe, Meg, Chris, Jay, and Jay's babies, Annabelle and Emily. They were adorable, though they did poo a lot. We spent a while at the triangle, then went to the beach, sat in the gardens, and enjoyed our mass amounts of nosh. We threw a Jaffa Cake at a seagull (not maliciously), and, to our disbelief, it swallowed it whole. The cakey snack formed a gaint lump in the seagulls neck before it properly swallowed it all down, it was amazing. We tried to get it to happen again, but we weren't so succesful.
Then we went off to Jay and her girlfriend Kate's pad. We sat around having a laugh and listening to tunes - It was one of those simple nights that I really love, where you can just chillax and have fun. So yeah, it was awesome, a really nice night.
Thursday:
No task. Go figure.
Went to the cinema with Dave and Chloe to see 'Terminator: Salvation'. Was awesome seeing Dave again, haven't seen him in ages, he loved the belated birthday present I bought him - a Barack Obama bobblehead, natch.
My feelings on 'Terminator: Salvation'. Mixed feelings. It was good, an entertaining slice of fun. But unfortunately, it wasn't much more, which I feel the other Terminator films are. I had some problems, and the more I think about them the more they dawn on me. Firstly, it didn't feel like a Terminator film. I know this shouldn't be a major issue, but it kind of bothered me, it only felt like a Terminator film in its final scenes, and then it seemed like it was trying too hard. Ultimately, it just didn't have the soul of the other films, they all had purpose and meaning (even the third one, I think it has a beautiful ending), this one just felt like a long action scene. And it was a damn good action scene, just not exactly what I wanted. Oh well. Still fun. 4 stars!
Me and Chloe had a long convo when we got home. It was LOOOOOONG. Okay, like an hour and a bit, but still. That's pretty long. It was a nice convo, and I had a good day.
Friday:
Today task any do didn't I.
In the evening I went to the pub with Meg, Meech, Chloe and Emily, or a few pubs to be precise. I had mostly a good time, I tend to feel a little lonely in pubs, but that's more because I know it's not a good idea for me to get drunk, so I feel like an outcast sometimes. I won't rant about that now though.
Anyways, had a good night ultimately. Meg and I played pool, and Emily helped me cheat when she wasn't paying attention. Also I sent some mysrery texts to someone, but I will not explain that here in case they read this. Which they won't, but regardless. Chloe and I had fun putting on some choons on the jukebox and dancing. And I had a nice chat with Meech about spiders, which sounds unpleasant, but was pretty funny. I haven't seen Meech properly in ages, I mean like just us two, and I really miss her, I can't wait to see her on Monday.
Saturday:
Didn't do any task. I like to surprise ;)
I had a night in, so I watched 'The Broken'. It was an okay horror movie, but it was soooo slow, I'm fine with slow films, but it was easy to tell with this one that they had difficulty stretching it to 80 minutes, so just played out every scene reallllly slooooowwlllly. It was fairly creepy though, despite the plot being a little odd and the twist not making that much sense. Lena Headey was naked in it though, and, I'm not being a pervert, but that is a very good thing. 3 stars!
Sunday:
No task. I genuinely planned to do some today, but seeing as I was hanging out with friends I didn't think this would be very fair really. Ah well, whilst funny it didn't seem like a particularly interesting task anyway...
Anyways, today I hung out with Chloe and Kirstie. It was a miserable morning, but, as if God was watching over us and was a fan of our crazy antics, the weather cleared up just before we left. Chloe and I first met up and discussed Pokemon for ages. Then Kirstie came along and we went into town. We decided that I should use the sink in my room as a fishtank, and planned to go get some fish from Conkers, but, alas, it was closed! We then went to the beach for a bit, and then went to the Spar and to the clifftops for nosh. Kirstie kept taking videos on her camera today, so I invented a rap song about teethed vaginas, inspired by her ringtone, which was a song from the awful (sorry Kirstie!) movie Teeth. We headed back and Kirstie hit us with a lily that she found. She then dared me to eat it, telling me they were okay to eat...
...So I ate a bit, being the fool I am. Oops. A very itchy tongue ensued. Not nice. We all parted ways here, and when I got home I told mum about my itchy tongue. She got very worried about the fact that i ate a lily. Partly because I ate a lily at 20 years of age, but mostly because she thought they were poisonous. She went on the internet to find out for sure, and it turns out she's right. Oh dear. She then called a doctor, but I only ate a little bit, so i should be fine. Still, I'm possibly partly poisoned right now, but at least my tongue has stopped itching! A very strange day to say the least, but extremely awesome because of it...
Thanks for reading. I hope you came away from this feeling enlightened that you're not as stupid as I am...
Love,
Rivers
Monday:
Okay, I did a little bit of the task, but it was insulting Meg - I told her she didn't smell too bad for a student, which i stole directly from the book. It confused the hell out of her, and thus was very funny.
We went out to see '12 Rounds', which wasn't a good film in most terms of the word, but was a lot of fun. Very much like the 90's kind of action films I grew up on, so very enjoyable, we both had a good time watching it. I give it 3 stars!
Tuesday:
No task done. 'Cos I suck.
Went to Zanny's BBQ today, which was pretty damn dope. The sun was absolutely fucking baking today, We were all in swimming trunks and bikinis. No, that's not true. But it would have been appropraite considering the weather. The food was lush, I think we had something along the lines of 60 burgers or something. I mean, there were about that many burgers there, we didn't eat that many. Also played a bit of Guitar Hero, naturally. Zanny and I discussed starting up a band, if we can find a bassist it might well happen. Also, we listened to N.W.A. on the drive home. So, you know, that was fucking awesome.
Wednesday:
No no, no no no no, no no no no, no no there's no task no.
Had a picnic with Meech, Chloe, Meg, Chris, Jay, and Jay's babies, Annabelle and Emily. They were adorable, though they did poo a lot. We spent a while at the triangle, then went to the beach, sat in the gardens, and enjoyed our mass amounts of nosh. We threw a Jaffa Cake at a seagull (not maliciously), and, to our disbelief, it swallowed it whole. The cakey snack formed a gaint lump in the seagulls neck before it properly swallowed it all down, it was amazing. We tried to get it to happen again, but we weren't so succesful.
Then we went off to Jay and her girlfriend Kate's pad. We sat around having a laugh and listening to tunes - It was one of those simple nights that I really love, where you can just chillax and have fun. So yeah, it was awesome, a really nice night.
Thursday:
No task. Go figure.
Went to the cinema with Dave and Chloe to see 'Terminator: Salvation'. Was awesome seeing Dave again, haven't seen him in ages, he loved the belated birthday present I bought him - a Barack Obama bobblehead, natch.
My feelings on 'Terminator: Salvation'. Mixed feelings. It was good, an entertaining slice of fun. But unfortunately, it wasn't much more, which I feel the other Terminator films are. I had some problems, and the more I think about them the more they dawn on me. Firstly, it didn't feel like a Terminator film. I know this shouldn't be a major issue, but it kind of bothered me, it only felt like a Terminator film in its final scenes, and then it seemed like it was trying too hard. Ultimately, it just didn't have the soul of the other films, they all had purpose and meaning (even the third one, I think it has a beautiful ending), this one just felt like a long action scene. And it was a damn good action scene, just not exactly what I wanted. Oh well. Still fun. 4 stars!
Me and Chloe had a long convo when we got home. It was LOOOOOONG. Okay, like an hour and a bit, but still. That's pretty long. It was a nice convo, and I had a good day.
Friday:
Today task any do didn't I.
In the evening I went to the pub with Meg, Meech, Chloe and Emily, or a few pubs to be precise. I had mostly a good time, I tend to feel a little lonely in pubs, but that's more because I know it's not a good idea for me to get drunk, so I feel like an outcast sometimes. I won't rant about that now though.
Anyways, had a good night ultimately. Meg and I played pool, and Emily helped me cheat when she wasn't paying attention. Also I sent some mysrery texts to someone, but I will not explain that here in case they read this. Which they won't, but regardless. Chloe and I had fun putting on some choons on the jukebox and dancing. And I had a nice chat with Meech about spiders, which sounds unpleasant, but was pretty funny. I haven't seen Meech properly in ages, I mean like just us two, and I really miss her, I can't wait to see her on Monday.
Saturday:
Didn't do any task. I like to surprise ;)
I had a night in, so I watched 'The Broken'. It was an okay horror movie, but it was soooo slow, I'm fine with slow films, but it was easy to tell with this one that they had difficulty stretching it to 80 minutes, so just played out every scene reallllly slooooowwlllly. It was fairly creepy though, despite the plot being a little odd and the twist not making that much sense. Lena Headey was naked in it though, and, I'm not being a pervert, but that is a very good thing. 3 stars!
Sunday:
No task. I genuinely planned to do some today, but seeing as I was hanging out with friends I didn't think this would be very fair really. Ah well, whilst funny it didn't seem like a particularly interesting task anyway...
Anyways, today I hung out with Chloe and Kirstie. It was a miserable morning, but, as if God was watching over us and was a fan of our crazy antics, the weather cleared up just before we left. Chloe and I first met up and discussed Pokemon for ages. Then Kirstie came along and we went into town. We decided that I should use the sink in my room as a fishtank, and planned to go get some fish from Conkers, but, alas, it was closed! We then went to the beach for a bit, and then went to the Spar and to the clifftops for nosh. Kirstie kept taking videos on her camera today, so I invented a rap song about teethed vaginas, inspired by her ringtone, which was a song from the awful (sorry Kirstie!) movie Teeth. We headed back and Kirstie hit us with a lily that she found. She then dared me to eat it, telling me they were okay to eat...
...So I ate a bit, being the fool I am. Oops. A very itchy tongue ensued. Not nice. We all parted ways here, and when I got home I told mum about my itchy tongue. She got very worried about the fact that i ate a lily. Partly because I ate a lily at 20 years of age, but mostly because she thought they were poisonous. She went on the internet to find out for sure, and it turns out she's right. Oh dear. She then called a doctor, but I only ate a little bit, so i should be fine. Still, I'm possibly partly poisoned right now, but at least my tongue has stopped itching! A very strange day to say the least, but extremely awesome because of it...
Thanks for reading. I hope you came away from this feeling enlightened that you're not as stupid as I am...
Love,
Rivers
Monday, 1 June 2009
"Change One Life" Week
Firstly, an apology, for me being a dumb shit basically. On my last blog I claimed that my family left for holiday last Saturday. Which isn't true at all, it was actually the Monday of the week I'm about to chronicle. I don't know why I thought that, and I'm probably a terrible person for not knowing this properly. I could have gone back and edited it, but we all have to face up to our mistakes, right? Right. Now you know that I'm an awful person, on with the week ahead.
Anyways, this week in my diary was "Change One Life" Week, as the observant of you may have figured from my blog title... This task required members to sign up to be a lucky Benrik reader who will have their life changed by other members. Awesome!
Monday:
All I did in relation to the task today was write up my application, which required a brief outline of my life and what needs to be changed. I probably went in to way more detail than required, but oh well. Here is said application, warts and all:
My name is James Small. I was born on 24th October 1988 in Suffolk, to a middle-class family. Unfortunately my parents divorced when I was young, though I don’t think it has affected me too much, though I don’t often see my father. I attended primary school as a child, where I was a bit rebellious, I was the class clown, but I was always friendly. After that I went to high school, where I was still a bit rebellious, but not so much so. I passed my GCSEs with decent grades. I then went on to Sixth Form where I studied Film, Media, and English. I passed Film and Media, but not English. However, my grades were good enough to take me to University, where I now study Film and Media Studies. I have just finished the second year. I have also recently discovered Benrik, which has made life quite different since…
I am a geeky, friendly, shy but fun-loving guy. I love music (most genres), films (most genres), playing drums (though I can’t find a band), writing scripts, and playing video games. I don’t have millions of friends like everyone else in the world, but the ones I do have I love to bits, and I think it's more important to have a few great friends than loads of distant friends. I am pretty much the only single person I know, and probably the only virgin too. Because of this, I do tend to get lonely, paranoid and sad sometimes, but for the most part I am a pretty happy guy. I am also a paperboy, at 20 years old, which is very lame and embarrassing, because I can’t find a job. I could blame the recession, but I’m also just pretty lazy.
What needs changing in my life: Help finding a girlfriend - I know being single isn’t that major an issue, but I feel very lonely and get jealous because all my friends have someone. I also need a decent job, and being in a band, or at least having the money to form a solo project, would help. Not that I’m asking for money, but that’s what the job is for…
Lots of love, James
Man, that's pretty brutal. Now you know about all my embarassing personal stuff. Oh well. Y'know, I'm a human being, we're all flawed. Don't judge me. Honesty is a good thing though, so we are led to believe...
My family actually DID leave for Malta today, by the way.
In the evening I went to the cinema with Chloe and we watched Tormented, which was awesome, we had such a fun time watching it. We loved the eyeball bit! I like how Chloe and I talk about everything and nothing at the same time. I can't remember exactly what we talked about today, because this was a week ago, but we always have really deep conversations next to really stupid conversations. She's my fwwwwwieeeeend ^_^
Tuesday:
I realised that I'd probably screwed myself over in this task by not signing up to the Benrik sight. As such, they wanted a photo and log-in from me. Lame. Anyways, some lady with an awesome fringe won instead. Not that I have a problem with this. She has an awesome fringe, thus deserved it. She wanted to escape her boring life, basically. Meanwhile, I had to think of a task for her...
Spent the day in my house with Meg, Chloe, Meech, Chris, Joseph and Emily. We didn't really do much except sit in the kitchen and stuff, but it was fun. We took an excursion into town to get ingredients for chocolate crunch. We wrote up a funny recipe for chocolate crunch too ('You'll need, like, a spatula', 'Add chopped adult', etc.). The chocolate crunch was super rich, but was tasty. We also got out our guinea pig, Gus, who pooed and weed on me. Fortunately guinea pigs have cute poo and wee, so I didn't mind... A very good day, I was sad when it was all over, like I always am when days out with friends end, but I guess it's for happy reasons that I feel sad.
Wednesday:
No task today. I forgot.
Went to the cinema with Meg to see Drag Me To Hell, which was awesome! I really loved it, it was an awesome throwback to Raimi's Evil Dead days for me, just over-the-top scares, laughs and gross-out. Just pure fun. Afterwards Meg and I went to Zizzi for dinner, a posh restaurant. She was worried people would think we were a couple, so I kept calling her my 'missus'. I was tempted to order stuff saying that, but I decided I was being mean enough already.
Thursday:
No task.
Spent the day with Ping and her boyfriend Tom. Unfortunately I was feeling a bit ill today, so I was a bit distant all day, but i still had a good time. I called Ping Jackie Chan at one point, which was funny. Because racism is funny. She found it funny too, so it's all okay. I love people who don't take racism offensively, because it's the only way you can really fight racism, by not being upset by the things they've said to upset you.
Was meant to be going to Betty's with some friends that night, but I still wasn't feeling well so I bailed out. As it turned out, everyone else bailed too, except Meech, who bailed out, but then changed her mind. I don't know why I'm writing all this pointless detail, I didn't wanna lie I guess. Anyways, I was sad I missed the karaoke night, but oh wells.
Friday:
No task. I'm good, me.
In the day I went to the cinema with Chloe and Dayna and we had a lush double bill - Star Trek and Drag Me To Hell. YASSSSSS! Chloe and I laughed at stupid bits of Star Trek, like when old Spock's voice slowed down, and Kirk's face when he was exiled onto that snow planet. Good times. We also got McDonalds, thanks to Dayna generously giving us some rather nice Maccy D vouchers.
That night I hung out with Kirstie, whom I hadn't seen in ages. It was nice to catch up with her, we just went for a walk and kept spazzing over summer and birthdays. We're thinking about starting up a band, we discussed this while singing along to Reuben songs. If that happens it'll be awesome! We also took photos, there were some epic ones of me being a spastic. As if I could be anything else.
Saturday:
I actually did some task! Woo! I sent a challenge for awesomely-befringed lady. In her description she said she wanted a way out which didn't require lobotomy... So I suggested trepanning instead. I said that she should go to the doctor's, convince them she needs trepanning, and see how far she can get them to go along with it. I was quite proud of this idea.
I watched The Orphanage, which Chloe kindly lent to me. It was a really good film, it took me a bit to get into, because I'm not one for slow-paced ghost stories usually, but it was well worth it, there were some incredible scenes, not least the ending. I'd be lying if I said I didn't let out a few tears at the end, it was beautiful, ambiguous, sad, and redemptive. All at the same time. Loved it.
Sunday:
I don't think my task got picked. Sad times. I tried to apply for the Benrik website, but it wouldn't let me log-in. Jesus Christ. I can never be a true Benrikian. Oh well, it's probably some weird trick they're playing to fuck with me.
That night I watched The Children, which was a bit shit. It was slow, dull, not as gory as it should have been, and nor was it funny. It was a hard enough idea to take seriously (kids get some disease that makes them murderous), so a little bit of humour wouldn't have gone amiss. But no, there was none of that. Just plain dull really.
That's it for that week. I'm gonna try and update more frequently from now on, I don't like having to write my whole week in one big block. Just thought I'd let you know =)
Love,
xoxox
Anyways, this week in my diary was "Change One Life" Week, as the observant of you may have figured from my blog title... This task required members to sign up to be a lucky Benrik reader who will have their life changed by other members. Awesome!
Monday:
All I did in relation to the task today was write up my application, which required a brief outline of my life and what needs to be changed. I probably went in to way more detail than required, but oh well. Here is said application, warts and all:
My name is James Small. I was born on 24th October 1988 in Suffolk, to a middle-class family. Unfortunately my parents divorced when I was young, though I don’t think it has affected me too much, though I don’t often see my father. I attended primary school as a child, where I was a bit rebellious, I was the class clown, but I was always friendly. After that I went to high school, where I was still a bit rebellious, but not so much so. I passed my GCSEs with decent grades. I then went on to Sixth Form where I studied Film, Media, and English. I passed Film and Media, but not English. However, my grades were good enough to take me to University, where I now study Film and Media Studies. I have just finished the second year. I have also recently discovered Benrik, which has made life quite different since…
I am a geeky, friendly, shy but fun-loving guy. I love music (most genres), films (most genres), playing drums (though I can’t find a band), writing scripts, and playing video games. I don’t have millions of friends like everyone else in the world, but the ones I do have I love to bits, and I think it's more important to have a few great friends than loads of distant friends. I am pretty much the only single person I know, and probably the only virgin too. Because of this, I do tend to get lonely, paranoid and sad sometimes, but for the most part I am a pretty happy guy. I am also a paperboy, at 20 years old, which is very lame and embarrassing, because I can’t find a job. I could blame the recession, but I’m also just pretty lazy.
What needs changing in my life: Help finding a girlfriend - I know being single isn’t that major an issue, but I feel very lonely and get jealous because all my friends have someone. I also need a decent job, and being in a band, or at least having the money to form a solo project, would help. Not that I’m asking for money, but that’s what the job is for…
Lots of love, James
Man, that's pretty brutal. Now you know about all my embarassing personal stuff. Oh well. Y'know, I'm a human being, we're all flawed. Don't judge me. Honesty is a good thing though, so we are led to believe...
My family actually DID leave for Malta today, by the way.
In the evening I went to the cinema with Chloe and we watched Tormented, which was awesome, we had such a fun time watching it. We loved the eyeball bit! I like how Chloe and I talk about everything and nothing at the same time. I can't remember exactly what we talked about today, because this was a week ago, but we always have really deep conversations next to really stupid conversations. She's my fwwwwwieeeeend ^_^
Tuesday:
I realised that I'd probably screwed myself over in this task by not signing up to the Benrik sight. As such, they wanted a photo and log-in from me. Lame. Anyways, some lady with an awesome fringe won instead. Not that I have a problem with this. She has an awesome fringe, thus deserved it. She wanted to escape her boring life, basically. Meanwhile, I had to think of a task for her...
Spent the day in my house with Meg, Chloe, Meech, Chris, Joseph and Emily. We didn't really do much except sit in the kitchen and stuff, but it was fun. We took an excursion into town to get ingredients for chocolate crunch. We wrote up a funny recipe for chocolate crunch too ('You'll need, like, a spatula', 'Add chopped adult', etc.). The chocolate crunch was super rich, but was tasty. We also got out our guinea pig, Gus, who pooed and weed on me. Fortunately guinea pigs have cute poo and wee, so I didn't mind... A very good day, I was sad when it was all over, like I always am when days out with friends end, but I guess it's for happy reasons that I feel sad.
Wednesday:
No task today. I forgot.
Went to the cinema with Meg to see Drag Me To Hell, which was awesome! I really loved it, it was an awesome throwback to Raimi's Evil Dead days for me, just over-the-top scares, laughs and gross-out. Just pure fun. Afterwards Meg and I went to Zizzi for dinner, a posh restaurant. She was worried people would think we were a couple, so I kept calling her my 'missus'. I was tempted to order stuff saying that, but I decided I was being mean enough already.
Thursday:
No task.
Spent the day with Ping and her boyfriend Tom. Unfortunately I was feeling a bit ill today, so I was a bit distant all day, but i still had a good time. I called Ping Jackie Chan at one point, which was funny. Because racism is funny. She found it funny too, so it's all okay. I love people who don't take racism offensively, because it's the only way you can really fight racism, by not being upset by the things they've said to upset you.
Was meant to be going to Betty's with some friends that night, but I still wasn't feeling well so I bailed out. As it turned out, everyone else bailed too, except Meech, who bailed out, but then changed her mind. I don't know why I'm writing all this pointless detail, I didn't wanna lie I guess. Anyways, I was sad I missed the karaoke night, but oh wells.
Friday:
No task. I'm good, me.
In the day I went to the cinema with Chloe and Dayna and we had a lush double bill - Star Trek and Drag Me To Hell. YASSSSSS! Chloe and I laughed at stupid bits of Star Trek, like when old Spock's voice slowed down, and Kirk's face when he was exiled onto that snow planet. Good times. We also got McDonalds, thanks to Dayna generously giving us some rather nice Maccy D vouchers.
That night I hung out with Kirstie, whom I hadn't seen in ages. It was nice to catch up with her, we just went for a walk and kept spazzing over summer and birthdays. We're thinking about starting up a band, we discussed this while singing along to Reuben songs. If that happens it'll be awesome! We also took photos, there were some epic ones of me being a spastic. As if I could be anything else.
Saturday:
I actually did some task! Woo! I sent a challenge for awesomely-befringed lady. In her description she said she wanted a way out which didn't require lobotomy... So I suggested trepanning instead. I said that she should go to the doctor's, convince them she needs trepanning, and see how far she can get them to go along with it. I was quite proud of this idea.
I watched The Orphanage, which Chloe kindly lent to me. It was a really good film, it took me a bit to get into, because I'm not one for slow-paced ghost stories usually, but it was well worth it, there were some incredible scenes, not least the ending. I'd be lying if I said I didn't let out a few tears at the end, it was beautiful, ambiguous, sad, and redemptive. All at the same time. Loved it.
Sunday:
I don't think my task got picked. Sad times. I tried to apply for the Benrik website, but it wouldn't let me log-in. Jesus Christ. I can never be a true Benrikian. Oh well, it's probably some weird trick they're playing to fuck with me.
That night I watched The Children, which was a bit shit. It was slow, dull, not as gory as it should have been, and nor was it funny. It was a hard enough idea to take seriously (kids get some disease that makes them murderous), so a little bit of humour wouldn't have gone amiss. But no, there was none of that. Just plain dull really.
That's it for that week. I'm gonna try and update more frequently from now on, I don't like having to write my whole week in one big block. Just thought I'd let you know =)
Love,
xoxox
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)