Start The Riot!

Hello everyone, and a happy new year to y'all! On my last blog post I did intend to write up my new year's resolutions, but totally didn't want to! Nah, I'm kidding, I just forgot. So, with a little bit of inspiration from my best friends, here are my new year's resolutions, plus stuff I want to do over the course of 2010;

- Be more sociable - go out when invited out, see friends more

- But also see more of my family too

- Try to make an effort with Dad, in the hope that maybe he'll make an effort with my sisters and I. Maybe he doesn't deserve it, but I'm not someone to be bitter at people

- Do my Benrik tasking to the best of my ability

- Take more photos

- Spend less on shit that I don't need

- On a similar level, 'treat myself' less. If you catch my drift. I kinda hope you don't. But if you do, I'm not addicted or anything, I always just feel kinda guilty and lonely afterwards. Because I'm weird

- Try my hardest at everything

- Try to go to some gigs. And if Jesu are in the UK, DEFINITELY go to one of their gigs

- Learn to cook

- Be less opinionated

- Get a job

- Be happy

- Keep blogs consistent, hopefully

- Finish the current script I'm writing

- Get better at bass

- Actually pass my second year this time

- Gain weight - No, I'm not taking the piss out of everyone who says they want to lose weight, I think I'm disgustingly skinny, and don't think it would hurt to be a bit bigger

- Help out my friends with their new year's resolutions

- Stop accidentally writing/saying 'revolutions' instead of 'resolutions' and having to go back and correct my mistake

And I think that's that for my kinda long list of stuff. I'm looking forward to improving myself on these levels, and this whole year in general. It's gonna be awesome!

Today, I officially start some immense tasking in the form of 'This Book Will Change Your Life'. Things will start off easy, but it doesn't take long for them to get hardcore. I fully expect to end this year with; a criminal record, physical scars, psychological scars, no money at all, fluency in Esperanto, a ridiculous amount of quiche in my house, and much more besides. Even though I have strictly speaking done today's task, I will still continue my thing of writing about it the day after - just in case anything should need to be added after I've written my day's entry. So for today's entry I'll fill you in on my filling in - of the opening forms of the Book that is.

This Book Will Change Your Life belongs to: James Small

Stranger: If you find this Book, please return it to me if I know the secret word (which is didgeridoo) and I will give you sexual favours.

Personal details

Photo (Before): There's meant to be a photo here, but I can't get my fucking camera to plug into the computer properly. So fuck it, maybe someday soon, I will ACTUALLY be able to put photos on my blogs.

Name: James Small

Address: I wrote it down, but I'm not divulging that on the internet you cheeky buggers!

Phone (home): Same as above.

Phone (mobile): Nope, sorry.

Email: Rivers_315@hotmail.com

Computer IP address: God knows

Date of birth: 24/10/1988

Social security number: ??? (I genuinely don't know)

Bank details A/C: Not telling (I didn't even write this down in the Book, along with a lot of the following answers...)

Sort code: Still not telling

Internet password: ****** (Hint: It's not actually six asterisks)

Credit cards: Don't, have, any

Pin numbers: Or, do, I?

Burglar alarm code: A secret

Role model: Justin K. Broadrick

Aspiration in life: World's greatest director/musician

Childhood dream: Video game designer

Claim to fame: Benrikian of the Month, December 2009

Definition of beauty: Niceness

Explanation of evil: Horribleness

Other details you deem relevant: I have not taken most of this seriously

Completely unnecessary detail: I just ate chilli beef lasagne

Compromising detail: I love you (don't tell anyone!)

Is this book a gift?: No

In case of emergency

IN CASE OF ACCIDENT

Name of GP: Dr. Riiiiiip and Nurse Proddenfeel

Phone: ?

Medication: Tetrasyl 300

Previous operations: None

Limbs I would rather not have amputated: Toes on left foot

Organs I would rather not have removed: Balls

Current blood group: A/O

Preferred blood group: O

IN CASE OF AMNESIA

My favourite colour: Green

My favourite food: Pizza

My lucky number: 13

My sexual orientation: Straight

My best foot: Right

My best friend: All of them!

My most annoying habits: Biting nails, being annoying

IN CASE OF SUDDEN DEATH

Person to contact: My mother

Phone: Oh no you don't!

Break the news to them gently?: Yes

Confession (my worst sin): I did mean schoolboy pranks to someone I won't name, because I'm no longer being mean to them

I want to be: Cremated

Song to be played: Jesu - 'Weightless & Horizontal'

Do not invite: Adolf Hitler

Epitaph: 'If only he hadn't have done that task'

Lasting regret: Never saying sorry

My stuff goes to: Everyone in the world, shared out equally

Dear anybody who reads this, please go to my room and remove the stash of heroin from inside my TV before my poor mother finds it.

IN CASE OF THERMONUCLEAR WAR

Favourite isotope: Springfield Isotopes

Country where you agree to meet up with your loved ones within 10 years: Not yet discussed. Will have to be arranged though.

Woah, that was exhaustive. Hopefully I didn't divulge too much information and won't get my identity stolen. Would serve me right though if I did, I'd learn my lesson. Besides ALL the information was deadly serious! Especially about the heroin in my TV, and my doctor's names.

So, tomorrow I should, hopefully, begin blogging about my actual tasks. Stay tuned, folks! Oh, and for tomorrow: Happy new day! I don't see why a year should be so much more important than a day...